I got you
I heard some rumors,
I'm just hoping they ain't true
Been living good,
But it get better when I'm with you

:Dreezy

AMARAH

"Bout time you come back to school,"Niya laughed.

I rolled my eyes. It's been two weeks, and I was now back in school. Luckily I got to come back. After much back and forth between mommy and the doctor, I was allowed to come back. I just couldn't do any strenuous activities.

People stared as I walked through the hallway. That was nothing new. Pregnancy gave me the unneeded attention that I never wanted. I could tell it was starting to get on my cousin, Alayah's nerves.

She fought for attention. Hell I'm surprised she hasn't gotten pregnant for attention. She pulled hella stunts to get attention, and most of them usually worked, but the ones now aren't. Everyone was focused on my baby and I.

"Shit,"I heard a voice say. "I am so sorry."

I looked down at my dress and noticed the dark stain that dripped down. I cringed as the hot liquid seeped through my clothing.

"Bitch what the fuck?"Niya shouted.

"God I'm so sorry! I was trying to look at my schedu-"

"Niya,"I said softly. "It's alright. It was clearly an accident. No need ta trip."

Niya scoffed, "Bitch couldn't see your pregnant ass?"

The girl handed me the tissues she had in her purse. I politely took them and dabbed at my dark green dress. The stain wasn't going to come out, but it was the thought that mattered.

I looked down at her bright blue schedule. She was a new student. They only gave those schedules to new students.

"I'm so sorry,"She muttered softly. "I'm just trying to find my classes. Do you know where 308 is?"

She was a smaller girl. She had on a red cardigan with a black cami underneath. She had on jeans that had rips near the knees. Her hair was on the shorter side, shorter than me.

"How 'bout I walk ya there if ya help me get my extra clothes outta ma ca'e?"I asked her.

She pushed her bright red hair behind her ears. A small smile grew across her face as she blushed. I noticed her deep dimples. She nodded slowly.

Niya scoffed. Niya was very quick to judge people. If you make a bad first impression, she'll hate you forever. I've tried to help her with this, but she refuses to change. She believed first impressions are everything.

JORDAN

"First impressions are everything,"Janiya argued.

"He was fuckin ten yea's old!"Mar shouted. "Ya actin like he's the same person."

"I'm sorry, but I can't do it. Nigga didn't fucking apologize, and that says plenty about his character."

Mar shook her head. I could tell she was getting frustrated, and hell, I was too. Janiya was making this hard as hell.

This was my first time meeting Janiya, Mar's best friend. Mar wanted us to get to know each other since I would permanently be in her life.

"Get outta tha ca'e Jordan,"Mar said to me.

I opened up the car door slowly. She took the handle and swung it open. She placed her hand on my arm and yanked me out of the car. She was pissed, and it was very obvious.

Janiya stood in front of me. Her arms were crossed, and the look on her face was grim. She genuinely hated me for something I did years ago.

"Now Jordan,"Amarah said in this fake polite tone. "Apologize fa somethin ya did five yea's ago because somebody's still stuck on it."

I shook my head. All of this was unnecessary. In the fifth grade, Janiya and I were in the same class. She was on the swing, getting ready to jump off. I really wanted to get on the swing, so I pushed her while she was in the air. She let go and face planted straight into the wood chips. Instead of going to get a teacher, I ran away. The teachers came to the conclusion that Janiya jumped off the swing. I never got in trouble, but Janiya had plenty of splinters in the end.

"He's fucking pathetic, and that's why you can't be with him Amarah! He won't even apologize."

I waved my hand, "Hey, just because I won't apologize doesn't mean Mar shouldn't be with me."

"Get your fucking boyfriend Amarah!"Janiya shouted. "I swear to Allah I will fuck this nigga up!"

"Can ya please just apologize Jordan? Please!"Mar begged.

Tears were starting to stream down her cheeks. I knew Janiya was her best friend. She cared so much for her. Not having her approval would hurt Mar till the end.

"Come on Amarah. We're obviously done here,"Niya said as she snatched Mar's hand from mine.

Niya gave me a look that I knew would haunt me for years. She dug her finger into my chest. Her sharp nails scraped my skin.

"You're a pathetic piece of shit. You're not worthy of dating or even looking at my best friend. She deserves so much better, and as long as I'm living you will never be with her. Got that buddy?"Niya yelled. "Have a nice life by your fucking s-"

"Shut up!"I shouted. "Shut the fuck up!"

Both of them jumped from the bass of my voice. Janiya's eyes were terrified, and Mar had no emotion. I've went off on Mar before, so she was used to it. I'm sure she was surprised I was going off on her friend.

"Amarah is my life. I don't care if you don't like me. We're gonna be together as long as I live, so you can grow the hell up and let go of my girl."

She didn't say anything. She pulled her fist back, but before she could throw it I stopped her. Amarah pulled her back while she cried.

"Jordan!"Amarah cried. "Please! Just calm down! That's ma fuckin friend!"

RICO

My phone buzzed in my lap. I looked down at it. Janiya's name popped across the screen.

"Hey,"I answered. "What's going on?"

"I left ma textbook at ya house,"Amarah sniffled softly.

"Are you crying?"

"No-"

"Yes the fuck she is. Bitch really pulled me out of class to cry,"Janiya shouted in the background.

I shook my head. Amarah's hormones were starting to act up. She's never been this moody before. The doctor said it could be because of the medication she's on too. The pregnancy and the medication messed up her mood.

"Can ya please go get it?"She cried. "I really need it."

"Amarah,"I sighed. "Home is thirty minutes away, and I can't keep skipping."

"Rico, I need it. I'm gonna fail ma assignment."

"Amar-"

"Fuck it. I'll ask Gerald. Ya fuckin useless nigga."

The phone beeped in my ear. I shook my head and put it in my pocket. Amarah's emotions were literally all over the place. She was always going off, or crying to get her way.

Even my mother was getting fed up with it. She cut off my access to the house because she didn't want Amarah throwing fits in front of her guest, which means I have to wash my own clothes...at the laundromat.

I slid my jacket over my head. I would be skipping class once again just for Amarah. I honestly don't even know why I came. I should've just skipped first.

"Amarah?"Dr. Johnson asked as I stood up.

I nodded slowly. He said something under his breath, but he didn't stop me. He already knew that I felt obligated to help her.

"Bitch don't even like him, yet he's running around the world for her...talk about sprung,"Alayah said a little too loudly.

"Ms. Harper,"Dr. Johnson responded. "Watch your language."

"I'm not wrong though. I mean would you drag your ass all across the world for something who doesn't want you? I think not,"She laughed. "He's fucking dumb, and he knows it. He should stayed with Toni."

"Can you shut the fuck up?"I blurted out.

"Excuse me?"

"You always have something to say about my situation when you haven't figured out your own. Fuck off."

She looked around, "Is he talking to me?...I know he's not talking to me, right?"

I pulled my book bag over my shoulder. I didn't have time to argue with her today. All I wanted to do was get Amarah's textbook and come back before lunch. If I skipped half of the day, I would be counted as AWOL for the rest of my classes.

As I walked out, I felt a tug on my book bag. I turned around and saw Alayah in my face. She pulled back her fist to punch me, but before she could I grabbed her hand. That didn't stop her from hitting me. She took the other hand and socked me in my jaw.

The pain shot through my mouth as I tried to keep her from hitting me again. I won't even lie the shit hurt, badly.

She was getting ready to hit me again, but I pushed her. She stumbled over the desk, and fell backwards. I felt a liquid touch my tongue. It tasted dark, but sweet. I spat out the blood. Soon, I was on my hands and knees coughing up enough blood to lose consciousness, and that's exactly what I did.

AMARAH

"Ya kna I met this girl ya'd really like."

He pulled his face back from mine. I could tell I ruined the mood. I just smiled as he looked at me like I was crazy.

He smirked softly, "You?"

He then leaned back in to kiss me. I pushed him back a little, and he smacked his lips.

"Ha name is Shanti,"I said. "She spilled ha coffee on me this mornin. She's a real beautiful girl."

"I'm not worried bout no other bitc-I mean girl, except you Amarah."

I rolled my eyes in annoyance. Gerald was very disrespectful. He called people out of their names like it was nothing, especially women.

The word bitch isn't a terrible. I use it a lot, but never in the wrong context. If you act like a bitch, I'll call you one. Other than that I don't disrespect people like that. It's rude and disgusting.

"Ya kna we can't be ta'getha right?...I'm having another man's baybeh,"I said softly.

I wasn't wrong. I loved Gerald to death. He was there for me throughout everything. I wouldn't trade that for anything, but I can't do him like that. I'm pregnant with someone else's baby. I would never put him through that pain.

Honestly, I would be hurt if it was me. If I had to take care of someone's child when it's not mine. That's why I could never love someone with kids. Who you have kids by has a huge impact on your life, and I knew that the impact on mine would be crazy. I had a excuse sort of. Jordan died before I could have the baby, but it would always be his kid. I could never push a child on someone else.

Gerald wanted it though. Rico wants to be a father so badly, but Gerald is right behind him. He wants to help raise the baby, and have a little family. I just can't do that to her.

"How many times do I have to say I don't care Marah? I would go to hell and fucking back for you...millions of times if you needed,"He said. "I know it's not my baby, but I know...I love you...I've been in love with you sin-"

My phone buzzed in my lap. I looked down at it, and it was Janiya's name. Gerald snatched it from my view.

"I'm telling you I fucking love you Amarah, and you want to look at your phone?"

"It's ya sista, and she doesn't usually text unless something wrong. Ya kna that Gerald."

"Yeah and I also know that you're fucking bullshitting me right now. You're the first girl I-"

"Gerald I kna how ya do. Ya play girls, and ya think I'm supposed ta fall in line? Huh? Ya think ya really mean it this time, or ya just sayin it ta make me suck ya dick?"

"The fuck?"He asked with a stern tone. "You were so used to that fuck ass nigga Jordan, and you forgot how somebody would actually love you."

"Don't ya da'e talk bout Jordan li-"

"Fuck Jordan,"He chuckled. "Jordan treated you like shit, and you took it like the dumbass you are."

"Excuse me?"

"You're so used to being treated like fucking shit Amarah, and it's annoying. You want me to tell you what to do? You want me to go off on your for not doing what the fuck I say? Of course you do, because that's what the fuck you expect from a nigga, and your expectations are wrong,"He said softly. "I can't be that kind of person for you. I would never be that type of person for you Amarah, so when you're ready for respect...you can call me."

He took his thumb and wiped the tears that fell from my eyes. His eyes stared into my soul, and I could tell he was reading all the hurt I went through. He saw all the time Jordan silenced me, hit me, and disrespected me in every kind of way.

"Gerald, I-"

He pulled me in for a hug. I didn't say anything else. I just cried into the crook of his neck, and he rubbed my back slowly. There were no more words, and I wished it stayed that way forever.