What is the word

For the gut deep

SHOCK I feel today?

Betrayal is definitely not strong enough

Hurt is only the underpinning

Of a mountain of shards left behind

My destroyed soul sobbing silently

Gobsmacked implies I had admiration

Which isn't entirely wrong

Although the execution of his

Revenge was brilliantly illegal

Flummox, yes that's it!

I'm flummoxed and I will lick my

Wounds and heal before I return the

Favor