Just as the shore seemed just a whisker away when something caught the edge of Fallenfeathers vision, turning her head fear surged through her as she spotted an enormous wave of dark water rushing towards them. Fallenfeather knew they wouldn't reach the shore in time so with her draining strength she tried to brace herself as the wave crashed over them, as it hit it knocked Shadowsteps scruff from her jaws and slammed her against the shore. When she finally realised what had happened she leapt up exhausted only to see Shadowsteps black body sink into the swollen river, Fallenfeather froze in pure terror. A patrol who had been checking the nearby border rushed over. Squirrelheart who had been leading it caught a quick glance of Shadowsteps limp body get swept down the river, she spun around to meet Fallenfeathers terrified gaze.
"What in starclans name happened?!" Squirrelheart yowled glaring at the shaking she-cat, Fallenfeather slumped in a heap.
"We were splashing about in the river when the storm suddenly broke out and we got swept away and..... and...... a waved knocked him from my jaws.... I couldn't save him!" Fallenfeather yowled to the sky, in her eyes it was starclans fault her mate had died.
"Let's get you back to camp before you catch greencough," Berrysong meowed nudging the exhausted calico she-cat towards camp, Fallenfeather felt numb after what she had witnessed. Never in her life did she expect such a harsh storm, once the river had calmed down a patrol would go fetch Shadowsteps body. Once back in camp Nettlepaw bounded over,  not seeing his mentor he looked confused until he caught Fallenfeathers frightened gaze. Without thought Fallenfeather padded towards the warriors den, once inside she curled up in her nest shivering. She already missed Shadowsteps warmth and his soft gaze, a sorrowful yowling spread across camp making Fallenfeathers heart sink further into the dark pit the river had swept it into. She felt like it was her fault he died, rumours would probably spread saying she had killed him. All Fallenfeather wanted was for this to be a horrible dream so she could wake up with her mate by her side, a tail touching her shoulder made her jump.
"Easy there feather, what happened? Where's Shadowstep?" Came Echomist's soft and calming voice, Fallenfeather burst into tears.
"We thought we would go for a splash in the lake but then the storm broke out and...and...a wave knocked his scruff from my jaws while I was struggling to get us back to shore!" Fallenfeather wailed, Echomist with her swollen belly crouched down by her sisters side.
"It wasn't your fault, you tried to save him, no one could have done any better, let's go explain to Maplestar before rumours spread," Echomist soothed, Fallenfeather rose to her numb paws and allowed her sister to guide her into the clearing. A patrol had recently left to go retrieve Shadowsteps body from the river, the entire clan turned to Fallenfeather demanding an explanation.
"Fallenfeather, see me in my den immediately," Came the soft tone of Maplestar, Fallenfeather followed her leader her head and tail low. How many times would she have to repeat this horrible event, every cat would ask and Maplestar would have to give them something to answer their questions. Squirrelheart padded in also, of course the cruelest of all cats had to be there.
*one long explanation later*
"I say she's lying!" Squirrelheart spat, Maplestar was lost in thought. Fallenfeather sat hunched over, Maplestars gaze filled with sympathy.
"Why would she kill her mate when she's done nothing but try her hardest to make him happy?" Maplestar questioned, Squirrelheart gave a hiss of frustration. Something began eating at the back of Fallenfeathers mind, something she couldn't place her paw on.
"Well tell the clan those fibs I must organise tomorrow's dawn patrol," Squirrelheart hissed before storming out, Maplestar gave Fallenfeather a sympathetic glance. Maplestar then nudged Fallenfeather and led the way out into the clearing, the clan waited expectantly.
*one long explanation later*
The clan was silent while taking in such news, Fallenfeather looked around at the clan almost expecting them to rip her to shreds for not saving Shadowstep.
"Nettlepaw will also need a new mentor, Flintleaf you will continue Nettlepaws training until he becomes a warrior," Maplestar called changing the subject, Flintleaf was a senior warrior who had mentored two apprentices before. Flintleaf bowed her head before padding over to Nettlepaw and sitting down, Maplestar dismissed the clan before padding back into her own den. Fallenfeather felt sick to her stomach so she assumed she had swallowed bad water, Dewleaf was on her way to her den with some herbs when Fallenfeather bumped into her.
"Dewleaf I've a stomach ache probably from swallowing some bad water, do you have any herbs for it and some poppy seeds to help me sleep?" Fallenfeather questioned padding up to the wise medicine cat, Dewleaf nodded and padded into her den to fetch the right herbs.
"Here's some juniper berries to help with your stomach ache and here are some poppy seeds for sleep," Dewleaf explained pushing a wrapped bundle at Fallenfeathers paws, giving a thankful dip of her head Fallenfeather padded back to the warriors den. Eating prey didn't even cross her mind on the way to the warriors den, upon reaching her nest Fallenfeather chewed and swallowed the herbs half consciously. The sun was setting in the sky giving the camp an orange glow, as the clan shared prey and gossip Fallenfeather curled up into a tight ball. Some other warriors were retreating for the night, for Fallenfeather it felt like she only had her sister, apprentice and leader on her side. With a sigh Fallenfeather began to close her eyes, slowly but surely drifting into a restless sleep.