dear kai.
i honestly don't know where i'm gonna end up going with this letter but i guess we'll see.
today would be 2 years. August 11th, 2017 was the day we got together. and even though i'm no longer in love with you, and even if you were to come back right now and would want me back, i would decline because i'm in love with my boyfriend and wouldn't leave him for anything, it still hurts. it's one of those things that never go away. you were and honestly still are such a huge part of my life, you helped open my eyes and even started me on my road to recovery for a lot of things, and i will forever be thankful for you. i miss you everyday. and i think i still feel like this simply because of the huge disclosure we have. you suddenly disappearing was not easy on me at all, as it would be anybody. and although i hope and pray you're somewhere out there, doing great, happy, and maybe you're even with someone else now, i can't help but feel that's not how this tragic story ends. i'm sorry i wasn't enough for you to come back to but who knows. maybe we'll bump into each other one day and maybe it'll be just like when we first met and i'll be awkward and you'll make fun of my height. it's possible. but for right now, this is my goodbye. or maybe it's a see you later. i don't really know at this point. but i love you, and i miss you. 🖤
-Z.