I honestly don't even know why I'm writing these to you.

It's not like I'm ever going to send it anyway.

But, I suppose, these so-called 'letters' are a way for me to tell you what's going on inside when I can't tell you, even though it's the only thing I want to do.

I caught myself almost blurting out what happened several times this week. And I probably should've just let myself but I'm so scared of what you might think of me. I suppose I deserve it though.

The longer I take to tell you, the harder it gets.

Maybe I should just not tell you at all.

It would save an awful lot of heartbreak anyway.

Terri