Chapter 07

Dumating na iyong food namin. Hindi ko alam kung bakit parang biglang sobrang aware ako na pinapanood ni Pablo iyong bawat galaw ko. I wanted to tell him to stop but also... I kinda liked it? Pero ang hassle lang kasi bigla akong na-conscious.

"Wait," sabi ni Pablo dun sa may nagdala nung food namin. "Thanks," dugtong niya after niyang abutan ng pera iyong lalaki. Napahinto siya nang nakita niya na nakatingin ako sa kanya. "What?" he asked.

I simply shook my head, but for some reason, he just got like a thousand times hotter in my eyes. One of my rules kasi is never date someone who's rude to service staff. For me, that just speaks about the character of a person. Ayoko rin sa mga tao na masama ang ugali sa mga matatanda. I mean, given naman na na iyong ibang matanda ay asshole talaga kaya siguro maximum tolerance as much as possible?

"Aren't you hungry?" tanong niya nang nakaupo na siya.

"I am," I replied as I sat on the chair adjacent to him.

I took a deep breath before I started eating. For god's sake, I needed to calm down. He's just a guy, Cerise—hot, yes, but nonetheless, still just a guy. Hold your freaking horses.

"Are you okay?" he asked nang tumayo ako after a minute.

"Yup," I replied as I gave him a small smile bago ako naglakad papunta sa CR. Sinubukan ko naman na kumalma dahil wala namang ginagawa iyong tao at kumakain lang, but for heaven's sake, every time his Adam's apple would move, it was like the heaven was challenging me. And I was only human!

Huminga lang ako nang malalim at pinakalma iyong sarili ko dahil ayoko naman na magtagal sa CR dahil baka kung ano na ang isipin nun na ginagawa ko roon. Paglabas ko, salamat naman dahil tapos na siyang kumain.

"You're done eating na?"

He nodded. "Yeah. I was hungry," sagot niya.

"We could've stopped along the way," sabi ko habang bumabalik sa upuan. Thankfully ay nakatayo na siya ngayon at mukhang may hinahanap sa bag niya.

"I wasn't that hungry," sabi niya tapos ay nakita ko na kinuha niya iyong parang hygiene kit niya. Hindi ko alam kung signs of aging na ba 'to kasi ito na iyong mga bagay na hot sa paningin ko—iyong walk-in closet niya, iyong pagiging organized niya, iyong hygiene kit niya. Parang dati magandang ngiti lang okay na ako—iba na ang standards ko ngayon.

Habang nasa CR si Pablo para mag-toothbrush, binilisan kong kumain dahil ayoko na panoorin niya akong kumain. Halos mabulunan ako pero okay lang dahil mas mase-stress ako kung maco-conscious ako na pinapanood niya akong kumain.

Nang lumabas siya ay may hawak siya na towelette and he was drying his face kasi kakatapos niya lang mag-toothbrush.

Damn it—bakit literal na lahat ng gawin niya ay hot sa paningin ko? This must be stopped.

"What?" he asked.

Fuck.

Nahuli na naman akong nakatingin.

I shook my head as casually as I could muster. "Nothing," I said. "Received a text from my mom. We should be there by 1PM daw for some picture."

He nodded. "Yeah, sure."

"Do you think we can be late?"

Tumingin siya sa akin. "Do you want to be late?"

I shrugged. "Undecided that's why I'm asking you."

He sat on the bed with the towelette still in his hand. "I don't want to decide for you," sabi niya.

"It's a simple yes or no."

"Ten years from now, do you think you'll still feel the same towards your family?"

Kumunot ang noo ko. "What?"

He shrugged. "Because ten years from now, the photos will remain the same but what you feel might be different."

"Are you saying yes to my earlier question?"

He shrugged again. "No," sabi niya. "As I've said, I don't want to decide for you—you're an adult. Decide for yourself," dugtong niya. "All I'm saying is sometimes, when you make decisions, think about the bigger picture."

I groaned. "Stop making sense."

Natawa siya. "What can I say? I'm a very wise person."

"Because you're old," I said, sticking my tongue.

Natawa ulit siya habang naiiling. "What can I say? I like being old," sagot niya sa akin.

"Why?" I asked.

He shrugged. "I still feel the same," sabi niya. "Your 30s is like your 20s but with more money."

Natawa ako habang napapatango. "You know what? You're right," sagot ko sa kanya tapos ay nagusap kami tungkol sa mga ginawa namin nung 20s namin. It was insane how much I enjoy talking to this person—and it was even more insane kung paano hindi napuputol iyong usapan namin. Kung saan-saan na nakarating pero parang hindi kami nauubusan ng topic. Sometimes kasi kapag may kausap ako, it's more of a conscious effort to keep the conversation flowing. But with him? It just happens naturally hanggang sa hindi mo na alam kung paano kayo nakarating sa topic na 'yon.

Halos ma-late na talaga kami dahil nag-enjoy ako sa pakikipagusap sa kanya. Nag-text lang si Mama kaya naalala ko na kailangan ko na palang maghanda para pumunta ng maaga sa may hotel.

"We need to prep," sabi ko habang tumatayo.

He nodded. "By the way," sabi niya habang kinukuha ko iyong isusuot ko na naka-hang. I would just take a quick half-bath since naligo naman ako ako kanina bago kami nagkita sa café. "Do they know that you're bringing me with you?"

"Of course," sagot ko.

"Oh, okay," sabi niya. "Curious tho—what if I didn't say yes."

I looked at him and smiled. "Oh, Pablo, we were playing games, but we both knew that you'd say yes," I said before I let my smile linger a bit longer bago ako naglakad papunta sa CR. Pagsara na pagsara ko nung pinto ay agad akong sumandal doon.

Fuck, bakit ako iyong mabilis ang tibok ng puso? Ang unfair lang, ha!

* * *

I would've taken my sweet time na mag-prepare, but what Pablo said resonated with me. In ten years, may pakielam pa ba ako sa kapatid ko at kay Leo? A lot can happen in ten years—prime example ako. Who would've known na mapupunta ako sa kung nasaan man ako ngayon? Baka in ten years ay legitimately wala na talaga akong pakielam kay Leo. Sabi sa akin ni Jana, dadating daw iyong time na magki-cringe na lang ako sa mga iniisip ko kay Leo and Therese. I mean, naniniwala naman ako but definitely hindi pa ngayon iyong time na 'yon. Pablo reminded me of that. Baka in ten years, totally fine na talaga ako. Mas maganda na rin na nasa wedding pictures nila ako. Ang weird naman kung ieedit ko bigla iyong mukha at katawan ko sa wedding pictures.

"I'm—"

Agad akong napatigil sa sasabihin ko nang lumingon si Pablo at tumingin siya sa akin. He was in the middle of adjusting his tie nang magtama ang mga mata namin. I had seen this outfit when he sent me the photo... but seeing it in person was way hotter than the photos he sent me.

"—done..." I finished my sentence when I was able to gather myself.

Pablo didn't say anything, but I suddenly felt conscious—and hot—as he stared at me from my face down to my shoulders down to my waist down to my legs. I knew that this happened in a second, but ewan ko ba—with him, everything felt like it's being dragged into fucking hours, it's insane!

"What?" I asked because the way he was looking at me was making me thirsty at kung kukunin ko iyong complimentary water nung hotel, I'd have to walk past him and it's not a very good idea at this point.

"Nothing," he replied with a shake of his head and a small smile.

"Come on, you can tell me that I look good," sabi ko sa kanya when I finally gathered myself. I was very much aware of the effect he has on me, but it's only fair na may epekto din sana ako sa kanya, noh. Two can play this game.

"Do I need to tell you that you look good?"

I shrugged. "Oh, I already know, but it won't hurt to hear it from someone else," I casually said as I finally walk past him and grabbed that freaking bottled water... pero mukhang maling idea because the moment I walked past him, naamoy ko iyong pabango niya.

Why did he have to smell so good?! I literally had to fight myself dahil ayokong magmukhang weirdo na inaamoy siya.

I tried to drink just to have something to do, but mukhang nagmamadali ata ako, so when I took a sip, a bit of the water just fell through the side of my mouth. Great! Mukha na talaga akong tanga ngayon!

"Are you that thirsty?" he asked, a bit amused, nang bigla akong nabulunan sa iniinom ko. I swear to heavens, halos mamatay na ako dahil sa pagkabigla sa tanong niya sa akin. Ganon ba ako ka-obvious?!

"Cerise," he said, his eyes wide open, probably in shock dahil halos bumara iyong water sa lalamunan ko. For a second, he didn't know what to do. Inabutan niya ako ng tissue and then tinapik-tapik niya iyong likuran ko.

I kept on coughing and took a deep breath after a while. "Thank you," I said nung nakahinga na ako nang malalim.

"Are you okay?" he asked again, sounding sincerely concerned.

Tumango ako. "Yes, I'm fine," sabi ko. Fuck, nakakahiya!

Tumango rin siya, but he didn't look convinced. "Your dress," turo niya kaya naman napatingin ako sa dress ko. Shit. Medyo basa nga dahil sa tubig.

I was about to panic dahil nag-text na naman si Mama na dapat on the way na kami nung biglang lumabas si Pablo mula sa CR. Ni hindi ko napansin na naglakad pala siya papunta sa CR.

"What are you doing?" I asked, confused dahil may hawak siyang blower.

"Drying your dress," he replied as he plugged the blower on the outlet. He turned the blower on tapos ay tinapat niya sa palad niya na para bang tinitignan niya muna if mainit ba. Nang ma-satisfy siya, tumingin siya sa akin. "What?" he asked innocently.

I knew he said that he didn't play games and if I wanted anything, I should just outright ask him for it. But with what he's doing? I didn't know for sure if he was playing games... or if he was genuinely just like this... And kung ganito nga siya, ganito siya sa lahat ng babae na kilala niya... And I didn't know what to make of that.

Either way, I knew that this—whatever this was—was all for show, but at this point, he's genuinely just confusing me. 

**
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