"Wait, Dan? Dan Howell?" Dan's expression changed quicker than a racing car. He nodded meekly and turned his head to look over at a puzzled Phil. "You two know each other?" PJ asked happily. Dan bit his lip. He had never wanted the ground to swallow him up more than he did right at that moment. "I see you've changed haven't you, Daniel. It's been a while." Elle said with a small yet mischievous smile plastered across her face. With all the different lights shining on her, she almost looked sinister.

"How did you two meet?" PJ questioned. Dan looked over at Phil who was politely listening to the conversation while trying to refrain from intruding. Elle looked at Dan straight in the eyes and it seemed like everything stopped. All noises became indistinct, all faces becoming blurred, all things familiar and safe became alien and scary.

"So they don't know, do they Daniel?" Elle asked with a tinge of slyness in her voice. Her gaze bored into Dan's skull, all he wanted to do was run away but there was no point now. "Dan?" Phil said quietly.

"They don't know anything, do they? You haven't even told your so called boyfriend! They deserve to know the truth about you." Elle said loudly as she began drawing attention to the scene. The few around them began to turn heads. Phil looked over at a nervous Dan. The black haired boy began to fill up with rage, he was trying his hardest not to yell at this girl who was making Dan visibly upset and he was trying his hardest not to publicly get angry.

"Go on Dan, tell them." Elle said, peering her eyes at Dan. "Now that's quite enough, Elle." PJ said sternly with a hint of anger in his tone of voice. "PJ, he isn't who you think he is. You deserve to know!" The auburn haired girl protested. Phil had such mixed emotions and he did not know what to do. He looked over at Dan who was quietly hyperventilating. Phil walked closer to Elle and she was intimidated by him towering over her.

Phil said while keeping calm, "I don't know who you are or what you know about Dan but you need to mind your own business and leave him alone." The way he spoke so seriously left Elle in shock. He walked back over to Dan and said, "We're leaving, come on." The blue eyed boy walked over to PJ to apologize and thank him. Elle squinted her eyes and quickly walked over to Dan. "You got lucky." She said under her breath. He gulped. 

Within the next five minutes, the two boys were already sitting in a taxi to get home. They sat in silence for a few minutes until Phil looked over at Dan and mumbled, "Are you alright?" The brown haired boy gulped before he took a breath to say anything. His heart was beating out of his chest, he thought that all of his past could have been forgotten but he was wrong. "I'm sorry, Phil" Dan said softly. "Can we talk when we get home?"

The rest of the ride home was quiet. Phil spent most of it looking out the window as pellets of rain gushed against the side of the taxi. Dan thought about what he was going to say when they got back to the apartment, he wanted time to slow down so he could think but before they knew it they were home. 

Phil got out of the taxi and opened the door for Dan and gave him a small smile. The brown eyed boy pulled himself out of the leathery seat and gained his balance on the grey, uneven pavement. The pair stood still for a few moments as the rain poured down and simply looked at each other until Phil broke the eye contact by giving his boyfriend a little hug which was followed by a "Let's get you inside with a nice hot chocolate."

In what seemed like no time, Dan and Phil were both inside with blankets wrapped round them and cupping their hot mugs with their ice cold hands in front of the television. "Dan, I don't know what happened in the past that Elle knows about. It wasn't nice what she did and whatever the thing is, know that I'm not on her side okay? Now, what was it?" Phil's tone turned from happy to more serious towards the end of his sentence as he looked at the now curly haired boy with confusion. 

Dan breathed in. "I won't beat around the bush, I need to get this over with." He coughed as he felt his stomach flipping upside down and turning around and around. "Elle was my next door neighbour ever since I was four, that's how she knew me. I never really was friends with her, sometimes my mum did force me to go on play dates when we were little so she could talk to Elle's mum. She hated me because I oncecut off all her dolls' hair and beheaded them."

"Anyway, the bad thing happened in secondary school. I wasn't that popular but I just kept on being myself which made me a target. There was this one guy who always went too far. He would pick on things that he knew hurt me, personal things. One day he crossed the line."

"I had been pushed around by him pretty much all my life and I had always wanted to teach him a lesson. So when he offended me, I attacked him. I don't know why but I did and I hurt him badly. I broke his nose and sprained his arm. I never meant for it to happen but I was so angry."

"Anyways, I got expelled and had to move schools. That's when I went to Elle's school and the really bad thing happened. She made it her mission to make sure I made no friends because she hated me growing up. I ended up being the reject again but this time I got in with a gang. They were all unpopular so I assumed that I would fit right in, although they were rough looking, I was desperate. I started beating up people for fun and drank my problems away, I changed completely."

"It turned out that they were criminals and had all gotten expelled from other schools and the only reason why they weren't kicked out of this one was because they bribed the teachers with money they stole. They got me really drunk on a night out once and I was unaware of what was happening. I was brought into one of their vans where they drove off to do a very bad thing."

"They set fire to a building. I didn't stop them. I just watched and drunkenly laughed as they ruined the lives of people for fun. Nobody died luckily but people were severely injured and still are affected to this day. They went to jail as they were identified with CCTV cameras. I didn't get in trouble because I did nothing wrong but Elle told everyone that I was behind all of it. She wanted to make my life a misery. No one liked me, I didn't like myself."

Dan exhaled and his expression rapidly changed. It was like a weight had been lifted off his shoulders. He wiped a beat of sweat off his forehead as he opened his mouth to say "I don't know what else to tell you other than I've changed." The black haired boy stood up and walked to the door of the lounge. 

Phil's eyes started to well as he bit his lip to stop himself from saying too much. After a few seconds of deliberation he decided that saying anything would be unwise. 

"Goodnight Dan."

"Goodnight Phil."

A/N

I am sorry for piling all that onto you at once dang. I have been offline for a few reasons which I won't get into today. Sorry for leaving you on a cliffhanger for so long, thank you or sticking with me! 

Tagging some old readers in case you forgot I existed lmao Dobbyisntahamster miia0x dannyfire15 gayavocado bringguaca fucktozier colourfuldan JordaniStuff drearymil alldarkhowell chipwrites prettytyjo sirsir1412 waddleoddle bibleinabathofbleach @stargazingphan sorry if i missed anyone ily! 

This may be inconsistent but here's an update anyways!!

see you soon,                                      

beaminglester:)