I won't say it again.

Derrick POV

  As I watched Rob walked out the door and away from me, all I could do was breakdown.  He was right about me distancing myself when he mentioned Troy. It's just that the thought of losing him to that nigga dead ass was bothering. He was right I should've helped him remember by placing little hints here and there but after what the doctor told me, I thought it was better if I just let things run it's course. It's just that the more I heard him talking about Troy, the more I began to accept the fact that he just might not come back to me. I rubbed my thumb around the scrapes and dents of the ring. We've been through so much and the past year and a half and this was supposed to be our end goal.

  I pulled out my phone and called Malik. I hesitated at first because my home screen still had Rob's picture there, making the heart break even worse. "Wassup kid?" he asked as I paused.  I really didn't know what to say right now. "Hello? D? Yo!" he said. "It's Rob." was all I could manage to even say at the moment as another tear fell on the ring. "I'm on my way." he said before hanging up the call. I sat there replaying the conversation me and Rob had. I don't think he was being fair to me honestly. I was thrown out of my thoughts when I heard a knock at the door. I looked and saw that it was Malik. I opened the door to let em in. 

  "What's u- talk to me kid." he said as he saw my face. I took a deep breath before telling him everything, all the while my finger rubbed against the ring. "Wait a minute, D. Why the fuck did you tell him that you have needs?" he said as he rubbed his temples. "Because it was true. I mean should I have said that out loud? No but hell, I went roughly 6 months without sex waiting for him." "That's the thing, you was waiting FOR HIM. Don't you think he would've gave you that once he remembered who you was? You know Rob isn't stupid. He would've likely been in the same boat as you. No lie, that was the dumbest shit you could've said to him man." he said as I looked down. He was right and I knew that but it was what it was. I finished telling him the rest of the story as he sat there and listened.

  "Now that I've heard the full story, I'm not even gonna lie to you bro, I don't even know if you can repair things with him at this point. Y'all kissed, which should've gave you hope that he was coming around, only for you to push him further away and start a relationship with shorty. You treated him like shit for two months straights over YOUR guilt of being in said  relationship instead of just talking to him about your feelings. You should've discussed that the day after y'all kissed so that both of you would've had a clear understand of what was up first and foremost. He was right about you giving up because you would barley mention him. Even when I would ask you about him, you would just give me one worded replies." he said as I sighed. "It's just that I just didn't think he was actually gonna remember anytime soon. Plus he kept waving his relationship with Troy in my face. I couldn't deal with that."

  "What is it about Troy that seems to make you so insecure?" he said as I looked at him confused. Fuck he talking about? I guess he saw my facial expression because he clarified that statement. "I mean, every time his name is mentioned, you act weird. You're sitting here blaming your actions on him like the nigga made you do the things you did." he said. "It's not him, it's Rob. He's just apologetically him." I said as that was the best way I could describe it. "Let's be real, you wanted him to get with Troy. That way you wouldn't have no regrets about your fling with shorty." he said as I was starting to get annoyed. "Now you know I 'll be damned to give Rob up that easily?"

  "You did!" he yelled as I sat there. "That's your problem. You never told Rob anything. You just swept that shit under the rug. Then when realization hit yo ass you panicked. All of this shit could avoided all of this if you kept it one hundred with him. Now you sitting here looking like someone stole your heart." he said as I let that last part sink in. "All I'm going to say is this. Maybe time apart  is what y'all need. Especially you. You need to figure out who you want and if it's Rob, you're going to have to work your ass off to get him. Right now though, you need to be to yourself." he said as he got up to leave. After I heard the door close, I locked it and returned to back to the sofa. I picked up the ring and just stared at it. The day I gave him this was the happiest day of my life. After the accident though, I went through a range of emotions. The most prominent one being scared. 

  I was scared of losing him and that fear became a reality. Maybe this is for the best. 

  Rob POV  

  "I'm the alpha, the omega, everything in between." I rapped as I drove home. I tried my damnest not to cry while I was driving and so far, the music was helping with that. Once I made it home, I just sat on the couch and let out a deep sigh. I was interrupted from my thoughts when I heard a knock at the door. I opened it to see Alexis standing there with a smile on her face, "What's cooking good looking?" she said. I don't what came over me but I instantly broke down. "Wait a minute. What's wrong?" she said as she closed the door and hugged me. "I was too late Lex, he moved on." was all I could manage to say. She walked us to the chair. "Tell me everything." she said as I did just that.

  "So correct me if I'm wrong, him and ole girl has been seeing each other for about two months. Like dead ass after you kissed him, he ran straight to her? Did he even tell you about how he felt about the kiss?" she asked as I shook my head no. "The fuck is wrong with him? Then to top it off, his explanation was that he has needs?" she said as I just nodded my head. It's so much that was going through my mind right now that I couldn't even process anything right now. "I told that nigga not to give up and he does just that. Goes to show niggas just do not pay attention"(A/N: Fucking Facts!). "Now lemme ask you something, how do you feel?" she asked as I played with my fingers before answering her. 

  "Honestly Lex, I feel like my world has been turned upside down. My second biggest fear came true and I'm over here struggling how to cope with this shit." I said as she nodded her head. "Like I have a shit load of questions to ask him but a part of me feels like it's just pointless at this point to even ask him the shit because he already made his choice." I said as she nodded her head. "Have you and Troy been intimate?" she asked straight up. "NO! The most we did was kiss, which was one sided because every time I would initiate the kiss, I got no reaction from him. We only kissed twice." I said as she nodded her head. "Just wanted to get a clear understanding of the situation." she said as I nodded my head. 

  "All me and him did was hang out. He took me to the arcade a last weekend where I released my inner my child." I said as she laughed. "For real though. Everything has just been cool on the relationship part with me and him. I think it was because of his respect for me or Derrick that he didn't really press the issue." I said as she nodded her head. "I guess I can respect him for respecting what y'al had." she said as I shuddered a bit. It feels weird for her to say that. "Sorry." "It's cool. It'll take some getting used that's all." I said as I sat there. "You want to know what's weird?" I said as she looked at me. "I had that whole scenario pictured differently." I said as I laughed. "What you mean kid?" she asked. 

  "Like once I got my memory back, I would run straight to him and the first thing he would say is 'I've been waiting this whole time babe. I knew you wouldn't forget about me' and then we kiss. Ironic huh?" I said as I laughed. Only I was laughing, well pretending to laugh anyway. "Rob....." Alexis said as tears fell down her face. "Lex....stop." I said as the tears started to formulate. "You can't lie to me Rob, that actually breaks your heart." she said as I sighed. She saw through that huh? "I just wanted everything to go back to the way it was. That day he proposed was the happiest day of my life. I wouldn't trade that moment for anything." I said as I cried. "Let it out." she said as she held me to her chest. I think I cried for about 5 minutes straight, wasn't keeping track tbh. "How do you feel?" she said giving me a smile. "A little bit better but I'll get ver it in time." 

  "Well sitting around moping isn't gonna help Let's do something." I said wiping my face as I stood up. "Go karts?" she asked as I nodded my head. "Hold up nigga. I just melted my face off crying. Now I gotta reapply. Gimme 10." she said as I groaned. 

A Week Later      

  It's been a week since everything happen and I'm trying my best not to think about it but hey I can't help it. "Ight so this is just gonna be a straight run through since you pretty much have it down." Alexis said as I nodded my head. I went to my spot as the music started. I started walking down the pathway filled with confidence this time. As soon as I got to the midway point, I felt an arm latch around mine. I continued to walk. I went to my spot as the music stopped. "Sorry I'm late." he said to Alexis. "Mmmmmm." was all she said as she turned her attention to me. "You think you got it or do you want to do it two more times?" she asked me. "Let's go again." I simply said. "Hi Alexis." he said to her. "Right." she said as she looked at me. 

  I gave her that 'be nice' look as she returned her attention back to him. "Oh my fault. Wasup Derrick." she said with a smile. Only my friend can be fake like that. I just laughed at her. "Uh...hey Rob." he said as I turned to him with a smile on my face. "Hey. How are you?" I said. "Uh...hanging in there." he responded. "Well hang in there. It'll get better." I said as he looked at me in confusion. "Uh...OK." he said as he went back to his spot. We ran through the practice two more times before he left. "It's gonna be hard for me to be nice to him after all that happened." she said as she walked over to me. "I know but try. Especially since he payed for my plane ticket." I said laughing. "You knew huh?" she asked. "Yeah it didn't take a genius to figure it out. I'm grateful." I said as I smiled. "Ight. I'll try for you. No promises though." she said as I laughed.

  "Ight crazy. I'm gonna go before you torch his car. Next time we do this, it'll be the big day!" I said as she jumped up and down. "I can not wait to be treated like a princess." she said as I laughed before leaving. 

  The ride home was soothing due my mellow playlist I had on. When I pulled into my garage I saw him standing there:   

  If things were normal, I would've found this cute. Now, I just find it a bit creepy. I sighed as I finished parking the car. "Um hi." I said as I got out the car. "Hey. Can I uh, talk to you?" he asked as he was scratched the back of his head. He's nervous. I just noticed that as his hand was unclasped, the ring was in the other hand. "Wassup?" I said as I sat on my trunk. He thought we was gonna go in my house? Welp there's that. "Uh. I wanted to talk about what happened." he said as he played with the ring. "Go ahead. I'm not mad." I said trying to lighten the mood. "First off, I wanted to apologize for the things I said to you. They were foul and out of line to you." he said as I took a deep breath.

  "Rob I want to say that you were right. I give up. I made myself believe that you may actually end up being with Troy. It would've made the heartbreak much easier to deal with in all honesty then just permanently forgetting about me.  When we kissed, I felt like it was fluke and just you taking pity on me instead of it just being an honest kiss. I missed that so much but a few days after that, you started talking about Troy again, which made me believe that it may have just been an accident. I couldn't handle that so I decided that it was better if I moved on as well." he said as I nodded my head. "I always pictured that the day you would get your memory back, it would be the happiest day of MY life. We would've had a lot to catch up on/make up for." he said as I nodded my head. So that makes two of us then. 

  "I figured that if I kept pushing you away, it would've eased the blow my heart would taken, should you stayed with him.  I would also like to apologize for that as well. You didn't deserve any of that. Yes i could've help with the recovering of your memory but the doctor advised us not to for fear that you might've lost you memory again." he said as I looked at him surprised. He looked at me as his eyes started watering. I guess he was getting choked up. "Derrick...." I started to say. "I don't hate you or anything like that. I'm actually glad that you told me how you felt. Though I wished you would've done this sooner, I can't help but understand. I told you when we first got together that should something happen between us, I would never forget about you and I meant that. Although it took me some time, I kept my word. Things could be so different right now but the chip already fell where they may." I said as I sighed. 

  "Come here." I said as I opened my arms. He wasted no time hugging me. "Look at me." I said as he did just that. I leaned in and kissed him. This kiss was different from our usual ones. This kiss pretty much all of our feelings in it. I felt him wrap his arms around me. After about two minutes, I broke the kiss. "I love you so much Derrick, but your aren't mines anymore. I want you to make her the happiest woman in the world. Shower her in nothing but love and affection. When she hurts, comfort her. Hold nothing back from her. Motivate her. Grow with her. Promise me you'll do that." I said smiling through the tears. "I promise." he said as he cried. "I want you to keep this. You've rightfully earned it. Though I couldn't fulfill my promise in making it a better one, I want you to keep this as a reminder of how close you got. This is your standard from here on out. If they aren't aspiring to do this, don't even waste your time. Promise that you'll continue being yourself and that you'll make your boyfriend/husband a proud man." he said as he slid the ring on my finger. 

  "I promise." I said as I hugged him. "I'll see you around baby." he said as he kissed me before walking away. I looked at the ring as I watched him leave. "We were so close." I said as tears fell on the ring."

 Sooo close.

This chapter was so hard for me to write man.

This chapter does fit with the book right?

Thoughts?

Rob?

Derrick?

Alexis?

Malik?

Now excuse me while I go cry some more because that last paragraph really got to me.