Dax

After formally accepting the invitation for Kai’s coronation, everything became a whirlwind of activity. I was almost immediately fitted for new attire to wear to the celebration and was forced to attend meeting after meeting with Helios to formulate plans for every single thing that could possibly go wrong. At the end of the first few days, chaos felt routine to me. 

And as the day before our departure came to a close, Helios cornered me and begged for me to reconsider.

"Dax, this is madness. You have to understand that." He placed one of his hands on my shoulder and gripped it gently.

I shook his touch away and stepped away from him. "Ending a war that has plagued this kingdom for years is madness? Correct me if I am wrong, but allowing such a bloodbath to continue when I have the power to end it sounds more like madness to me."

Helios looked from me to the end of the hall as if wishing he hadn't began this conversation in the first place. He opened his mouth to say something, but quickly snapped it shut.

"I understand your worry. Jade and I will be travelling to hostile lands, but we will be able to handle ourselves out there." I attempted to take his hand in mine to comfort him, I was well aware of his anxieties regarding this trip, but he snapped it away from me.

"Jade will be able to handle herself." He said with a newfound aggression. "You will be deadweight."

The insult rolled off me. I would not deal with the barrage of opinions on the night before we left. 

"Helios, I refuse to pull the 'I am your King' card tonight, but I will not deal with your hollow insults. I have given you countless opportunities here in Madeo after your father disowned you, and for you to treat me with this mistrust is disgraceful." I squared my shoulders and stood my ground.

"Dax, I know that you can defend yourself, I should not have gone that low to insult you." He sighed in frustration. "But have you considered what good could come from the continuation of this war?"

"Are you mad?!" I demanded. There was no longer any desire to keep our conversation quiet. "You believe that there is good to come out of my people dying each day? What good could outweigh the dozens of people losing their lives every day this goes on?!"

He puffed out his chest to mimic my own stance, but lowered his voice immensely to where only he and I could hear. "After your father decided to turn this kingdom into a charity, you weren't left with much financial stability, now were you Dax? This war has offered an opportunity to correct the mistakes that your father made during his rule."

"I hardly know what to say to you." I was dumbfounded by his lack of understanding. "Are you truly so cowardly that you will speak lowly of the late king in a tone in which only you and I can hear? If you are to speak ill of my father, the least you can do is be steadfast in your opinion." My hands were shaking so badly that I clutched them into fists at my sides. My rage with Helios was growing to the point that the dark corner we stood in began to give off a faint glow that radiated off of me.

"You call me a coward?" He roared. "An assassin crept into your room and nearly killed you, but he left without a scratch. Didn't he, Dax? What did you do to defend yourself?! You had to wait for Jade and I to come rescue as we always do!"

"Good night, Helios." I said with a quick turn, fearful of what consequences could come from the rage building in my stomach. I shook my hands, letting the aggression slip from my fingertips.

"See? You run from every altercation you find yourself in. If any of us are cowards, Dax, you." The venom on his tongue followed me as I slipped around the corner and into my room for the night.

I shook my hands, my legs, my entire body but the feeling of desperation wouldn't leave. Every inch of me from the tips of my toes to the ends of my hair vibrated with an intensity to release the emotions pent up inside of my chest.

I held on to the foot of my bed and leaned my weight onto it. I focused on my lungs, and the breaths that filled them, but I couldn't calm myself. The words that Helios said wouldn't leave my head, I couldn't get peace. Everything was so loud and it was all too much for me to handle.

My knees buckled and I hit the floor with a hollow thump, but instead of getting to my feet again, I curled into myself and held on tight. My nails dug themselves into the skin of my legs, surely leaving marks all over the exposed flesh. I tried to breathe, but each one became more and more ragged until all at once, everything came flooding out.

I squeezed my eyes shut, fearing what I would see when I opened them. 

Slowly, I cracked them open after I had calmed down and the state of my room had me panicking all over again.

Every piece of furniture that was light enough to be moved had been flung away from where I sat and my belongings were scattered across the floor. Speaking of the floor, it had been scorched all around me and was still steaming from the intensity of whatever had just occurred.

I backed up against my bed and frantically looked around the room and then down to my hands. I had suffered no damage, which was surprising considering the state of my personal belongings. I kept surveying my skin, terrified that I would see blisters and burns, but none surfaced. I began to wonder if I should check underneath my clothes, but a quiet knock interrupted that thought.

"Your majesty, are you alright? Do you need any assistance?" 

I quickly answered for fear that the maid would try and enter my room otherwise. "I-I'm fine. Would you please fetch my general, though? I'm afraid we must discuss a few more travel topics before the morning." I hoped she did not see through the shakiness in my voice and attempt to check on me herself. Thankfully she agreed and left me to find Jade.

I began to shake once again, this time from fear rather than anger. Was that what Haelan meant when he told me about my power? Should I stay away from Kai until I understand myself more? 

"Dax?" Jade's gentle voice came from behind the door. "I came as soon as I was notified. May I come in?"

"Yes. Just, please hurry." I said shakily. Jade would know what to do.

The door creaked open slowly and she slipped in. Her hair was in a knot on top of her head instead of her signature braid and she wore her clothes she slept in.

"Is everything okay? I thought we had cleared all of the plans for tom-" As she turned from closing the door and saw the state of the room she stopped dead in her tracks. For a moment I saw fear in her eyes, as if she believed me to be dangerous.

I opened my mouth to defend myself, but before I could choke a single word out she rushed to me without any other concern than my safety.

She quickly wrapped her arms around my shaking frame and held tight.

"Are you hurt? Is anyone else here?" Her mind immediately began to try and understand the situation. "I am so sorry, Dax. I should have stayed close so if something like last happened again I could prevent it, but now it has happened again and I cannot even begin to imagine what you must be feeling. What can I do?" She rambled when she was nervous, and nothing comforted me more.

I stopped her with a tight hug and a whisper that held more uncertainty than I believed myself capable of.

"Jade, I.." I trailed off, scared to admit what I thought was true.

She pulled away from my embrace and held my face in her hands, as if showing me that she would never be scared of me.

"I think I might have done this."