Still, I am left speechless and blue. I can't seem to fathom such emptiness take place in my heart. The feeling was too foreign for me that I found myself lost on how to alleviate such feeling. Jimin in the other hand is another story, still his whereabouts remains a mystery and I loathe him to the core for it.

"...then he told me he only had one friend and that he didn't need more-" Taehyung went on and on, munching on his chips. He is sprawled like a hopeless gorilla on my bed, half of his feet dangling off the edge. How he managed to get in? I have no idea.

I could only sigh as I listened to his rants about how mean and obnoxious just park jimin is. He tells me he's so rude and straight forward, a bit grumpy and cold. Taehyung calls Jimin a heartless little bastard and I couldn't agree more. He calls him such names, he's basically insulting him but I didn't argue.

"—but still, I desire him as my friend." He sighs. I cocked a brow. Didn't he just call him such names like a few miliseconds ago? Then he chuckled. "I think he's going to be a great friend. He's cold and quite a snob but I think he's just a little confused and lost. He's cool. You're lucky, Jungkook. You got through his walls, you're pretty special."

"Not when he leaves you behind, without a warning nor a goodbye, might I add." I could taste the bitterness in my voice, along with the saltiness coated on it. "So much for being special."

Taehyung didn't bother answering after that and I kept my mouth shut as well. Only the sound of our breathing and the very audible sound as he munches on his cheetos. It felt awkward, the silence was awkward. It's defeaning, suffocating even. I didn't like it one bit.

"As a friend, Jimin sucks." I found myself glaring at no one in particular. Taehyung huffs upon hearing this, turning his gaze away from the ceiling to me. He doesn't say a word and just listens. I continue. "Friends don't leave friends behind. It hurts ya'know? I miss him more each day. I don't even get why I feel this way. He's such an asshole."

Taehyung just stares at me, contemplating whether to speak or not. But when he did, it almost got me crying. almost. "It hurts because you never wanted to be just his friend. You wanted more, Jungkook. You wanted him, to be his, to be together. You never wanted to be his friend, you wanted to be his lover. You were in love with him."

I bit my lip. "I don't think I was ever in love at all." I lied. "Maybe I was wrong. Maybe It wasn't love at all?"

"How come?" He raised a brow.

"I mean, he's good looking, talented and smart. Everybody would fall for his charms. But that's just the physical. Right now, I see him nothing but an asshole. A really handsome asshole." I stated, earning a chuckle from Taehyung.

"Do you find me attractive, kook?" He suddenly ask out of the blue. He then smiled at me, his boxy grin in full display as he these model poses that had me laughing. "I'm handsome, right?" he ask again. This time, I took the time to adore his face. Indeed he was handsome, Hoseok is a lucky guy.

"Yeah," and upon hearing this, he broke into a full blown smirk, his eyes sharp as he came into an abrupt sitting position. I look at him wierdly, a single brow arched up at his randomness. Slowly, he moved or rather he crawled, his face smug and full of pride.

"I'm handsome?" He wiggled his brows like a maniac. I found myself backing and leaning against my head board as Taehyung's face grew closer and closer, his eyes dark.

"What the bloody hell are you doing?" I scowled, placing a hand on his chest to stop him from nearing furthermore. But it didn't face him.

He let out a low laugh. "What does it look like I'm doing?" He rolled his eyes. "Going in for a kiss, obviously." He stated so casually, like he doesn't have a boyfriend at all, like kissing me wouldn't be cheating at all. Taehyung is nuts, no. He's insane.

"What the fuck?" I gasped, pushing him away a bit harder this time. I was about to punch him when he caught both my arms and had them pinned on the headboard, a devious smirk playing on his lips. "Fucking let me go, you psycho! Stay away from me! You have a boyfriend for christ's sake!" He ignored my words and just went in for the kill.

I could feel my heart beating louder and louder as his face neared, not because I'm flattered but rather horrified. I didn't want to kiss him. I want to push him away but he had on a strong grip on both my arms. I struggled to escape but failed. No, this is nit happening. I didn't want to kiss Taehyung, I want Jimin. His lips aren't what I crave for. He is not who I desire.

I could feel his breath fanning my face, thus my heart shattered. I didn't like any of these at all. I didn't want to be kissed just by anybody at all, a taken boy might I add.

It was then when I heard a loud humorous laugh echoed through my ears, a laughing Taehyung and a mocking grin displayed across his face. "Y-you think...You think I'd really kiss you? Bitch you thought!" He laughed, even wiping fake tears in the corners of his eyes. "I love my Hobi." He smiled.

"Fuck you." I spat. I couldn't help but feel annoyed. He played me. He fucking tricked me. And here I thought I'd ruin a perfect and adorable relationship such as theirs. The thought of kissing somebody other than Jimin terrified me.

"I'd rather Hoseok fuck me, thank you very much." He smiled, battling his eyelashes. I coukd only groan in annoyance and disgust. The image of the two doing the deed flash in my mind as a scowl made it's way to my face.

"You're disgusting." I groaned, stuffing my face on my pillow.

"Nah, I proved a point." He said.

"What point?!" I explained.

"That you love Jimin?" He said in a 'duh' tone, eyes trained on his cheetos as once again he munched on it. "That you could careless whatever he looks like, even if he's hideous, as long as it's Jimin. You didn't fall for his charms, you fell in love with the whole package— Park Jimin himself." he added afterwards.

I didn't know how to respond after that. He continued. "Why are you lying anyway? You make it seem like falling in love with Jimin is such a shame, like it's a mistake."

I could only sigh. "Well he's not entirely the perfect candidate to fall in love with, isn't he? Because if he is, he wouldn't have left me. I mean he could but not like this. Not without a goodbye."

"Maybe there was no goodbyes simply because it's not really a goodbye after all." He said in between munch of his cheetos. "I mean, what if he never really intends to say goodbye? Like goodbyes are meant for an end. It is the same like saying the end, over and done fourth. So what if he never really intends to end things with you?"

For the second time today, I was speechless. Come to think of it, Taehyung indeed has a point. Maybe, maybe it's just that. But it doesn't deny the fact that it still hurts. But maybe it isn't just that? Maybe this is his goodbye.

"Action speaks louder than words, tae." I scoffed, earning a smack in the head from him. I glared at him, only to have him stick his tongue at me.

"Like what his note said before 'I never brought you with me, but you were never left behind' Now what the fuck does that mean then?" He raised a brow.

"How the hell should I know?" I scowled.

"It means, he may not be with you but still, you remain part of his life. To make it simple, he didn't leave you behind—"

"Then where the fuck is he if he didn't leave me behind?!" I raised my voice, suddenly getting annoyed by all these. It earned me an eye roll from taehyung and another smack in the head.

"Idiot." He scoffed, staring down at me like I'm the most stupid person he's ever met. He threw a cheeto at my face, and I was about to wrestle him when he uttered the words that dug right through me.

"where else could he be? In your heart, obviously."