D: Phil I'm pregnant

P: hi pregnant im phil

D: rlly though

P: we never had sex without a condom

D: maybe it broke?? I don't know

P: how do you know you're pregnant?

D: oh well I dunno I've just been throwing up my guts every morning and eating random things everyday bc I wanted to

P: is what why you had ice cream with ketchup yesterday?

D: yes phil

P: oh my god

P: wait how are you pregnant

D: ever heard of

P: I hate you

D:

hey

P: you dork

D:

P: are you done

D:

P: OH MY GOD

D: yeah, I didn't like that version either

D:

better

P: DAN

P: great cropping there

D:

hey we should have sex like this

P: I hate you

D: I'm a meme what do you expect

D:

Love you

P: I hate you