D: holy shit

P: what?

D: Harry just ran into a pole and got a Boner and I don't know what to do

P: GET A SWEATER OR SOMETHING AND HIDE IT

D: but how the fuck does someone get a Boner by walking into a pole?

P: I don't know

P: maybe he imagined it as a giant dick?

D: okay that makes sense

D: says the gay parents

P: Well go hide it

D: I did

D: he's in the bathroom now 'dealing with his bottom buddy'

P: bottom buddy sounds like a nickname for you

D: sHUT UP PHIL

D: .... You should work at topman

P: I should

D: welp harry is done.. we're gonna go home now

P: ok I'll be here

D: love you

P: love you too