I spoke to her...
Well i texted her...
Since in our only break....she...um was with others...
I texted so much...but there was so much more i wanted to say...
Like......how.....
Ya know what nvm....
I have stuff but i dont really feel like typing...i feel like crap...
It feels like its fake....it feels like she doesn't really love me....but im so madly in love with her....and ya see...i dont fall in love easily...
Ive only ever really truly fallen in love with 2 people....
She...the way she is...always seems likes she is trying to ignore me...if i sit or be near her...she walks away....
Thats why i dont go near or talk to her as often..and when i do and try to break the silence it doesnt work....
As if shes tryin to run away from the reality that she has someone there
But see...
She trusts and depends on everyone else.....
The year....is almost over...
I said it before...i want it to end well....
I want both of us to end up happy...even though we well both probs rarely see eachother...if not at all..i want her to be like "..well i had that experience...maybe the next time...i will treat that person better..."
I know i will...but probably not cause ill never get over her....
But at least...i talked to her...after it thpught she said it was fine...so calmly.....and she said she had to go...which my first thought was to send her "please stop running away from ur responsibilities..." but then i realized....it sounded stupid.....and besides...i never know if she has something going on...
Well thats all...
Also im making a new book like this one and a new drawing book...
Boi