MUSIC: Under The Bridge - Red Hot Chili Peppers

Ryan above^

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Ryan's P.O.V:

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I switched on my left indicator and changed lanes. Amelia sat silently next to me. The radio played quietly on the town's radio station to fill the silence. It wasn't awkward; it was peaceful. My hand gripped Amelia's and I kept it entwined with my own even when I changed gear. She hadn't spoken much, but neither had I. We were both nervous. I knew it would be awkward for her but I couldn't do it on my own. Too many questions would've lingered and too many unknown answers would have hung in the air. The atmosphere would make me un easy and I knew that Amelia would help stop that feeling.

Her hair was down, swaying from the gusts of wind that kept entering the car through our open windows as we sped down the motorway. She was dressed casually in a pair of black high-waisted shorts and a baby pink and blue crop top. I liked the fact that she had stopped wearing so much black.

I also really like the fact that she was wearing more pink.

Pink was her colour. It made her look tan and suited her, no matter what the item of clothing was. She could have worn a bin bag in pink and I would have loved it.

Sunglasses rested on her eyes which didn't allow me to know where she was looking. She could have been starring at me, for all I knew.

I probably wouldn't have minded.

As much as I was nervous I was also giddy. I was excited, anxious, elated and worried all in one. Amelia seemed to know that and squeezed my hand occasionally.

"I'm really glad you agreed to come." I said quietly as we pulled up at a traffic light. It had only just turned red and I had a feeling it would take forever to change.

Amelia turned her head towards me. Her hand swept her hair from her face and she smiled at me.

"Me too. I'm glad you wanted me to."

"I couldn't think of anyone i'd want here more." I mumbled. I froze after I said it. It was cheesy. I didn't know what was happening to me. Every time I was around her I sprouted cheesy lines that would usually make me cringe. She laughed slightly.

"Stop turning soft on me Richards."

"Sorry, I can't help it. You bring out the cheese-ball in me." I said. I shifted gear as the light turned green again. The roads were surprisingly empty. We were lucky in the fact that there hadn't been any accidents on any of the motorways so far. My Mum lived a few hours away, but I knew it would be worth the drive.

Plus I got to spend a few hours alone with Amelia.

She still didn't know about our plan to help her. We were planning to keep it a secret since that way Gilbert was less likely to find out about it. I was just hoping he didn't get there before we were ready. The plan was commencing in a few days. That way I could get meeting my Mum out of the way first.

"What turning is it?" I asked Amelia as we came to a junction. She picked up my phone from her lap to look at the map.

"Turn left here then the second right is her road." Amelia directed and I nodded. Once we reached the second right I slowed down.

"Number 84 right?" I asked Amelia to double check and she nodded.

"Yep, 84."

"Okay." I mumbled. We drove past loads of houses and didn't stop until we got to the end of the road. I parked in front of number 84 and stopped the car. I didn't get out straight away though. Amelia grabbed the hand that was resting on my lap. She brought it to her lips and kissed my knuckles gently.

"It's going to be great." She whispered. I gripped her hand tighter as a panic fell over me. I gulped.

"But what if she's not like she used to be? What if she's actually really sick and Jade lied to me? What if her new boyfriend convinces her to hate me?" I asked in a ramble. Amelia didn't talk until I was done.

"If any of those problems occur then we'll tackle them. But for now, let's think about the positives. You're seeing your Mum again, Ryan. This is amazing. She's going to be so proud of you." Amelia said in a re-assuring tone and I found that I calmed down.

"Proud of me for what exactly?" I asked her. I turned to face her and she grinned at me.

"You've done a lot of stuff since you last saw her. You completed your GCSE's with great results, and you've nearly finished 6th form. You've grown a lot as a person, too." She said. I nodded. I pulled her by the hand that I was holding and pressed my lips to hers. She kissed me back and I pulled away shortly after.

"Okay, lets do this." I whispered. It was aimed more towards myself but Amelia squeezed my shoulder before she got out of the car anyway. I followed suit and shut the door behind me. I locked the car and when Amelia reached my side of the car I grabbed her hand again.

I didn't care if my Mum thought we were in a relationship.

When we reached the door I faltered slightly in anxiousness but knocked anyway. The door opened not long after and revealed a man. He was average height, broad and muscly. His plain brown hair was cut short and he had a few tattoos along his arms. He was wearing a white button up shirt with the first couple of top buttons undone and some black suit trousers. He had no shoes on, and I assumed that he was my Mum's boyfriend and lived there.

He smiled at me when he saw me.

"Hi, you must be Ryan." He said and when I nodded he moved to the side and let Amelia and I in. He nodded to Amelia. "And you must be...Amelia?" He asked but was unsure. Amelia nodded and smiled politely at him.

"Yes, I am."

"Well it's nice to meet you both. I'm Noel, Cathy's boyfriend." He introduced. He held his hand out for me to shake. I did. It was weird hearing my Mum be referred to by her real name. Whenever anyone talked about her she was known as 'Ryan's Mother' or 'Mum'.

"You too." I mumbled. He let go of my hand and shook Amelia's. We were still holding hands.

"I'm guessing you're Ryan's girlfriend?" Noel asked when he spotted our hands. I didn't know what to say.

Amelia answered for me.

"Uh, yeah." She smiled as they shook hands. She gripped mine tighter and I returned the hold.

"That's great. Cathy's just in the kitchen cooking, would you like to follow me through?" He asked but it was more like a direction. He moved towards the back of the house and we followed. It was small, but homely. There were some pictures on the walls but I didn't have time to see who was in them.

When we entered the kitchen it was spotless. I spotted my Mum bending down and checking something in the oven. My breath halted and I froze. Amelia noticed and forced me forward until we were stood by the 4 seater table in the corner. My Mum hadn't noticed me.

"Cathy, Ryan and Amelia are here." Noel said. She immediately stood up and turned around. She stared at me for a few seconds before tears welled in her eyes. She ran over to me and flung her arms around me with enough force that I stumbled. Amelia let go of my hand and I slowly wrapped my arms around her small frame.

She looked just as I remembered her. Her hair was dark brown and she was skinny and short. She looked healthier then she did when I last saw her, but she looked older. It was to be expected, really. She had on a long dress and an apron sat on her waist. It looked like it had flour on it but I didn't care. I decided to relish in the feeling of being in her arms again. I knew I was practically a fully-grown adult, but nothing was able to beat the feeling of hugging your Mum. Even if you hadn't seen her in years.

She pulled away after a few minutes and wiped her eyes.

"Oh Ryan, i've missed you so much!" She exclaimed. She spotted Amelia who was stood next to me and flung her arms around her too. Amelia chuckled lightly as she stumbled but managed to catch herself. "And you! You must be Amelia! I've heard so much about you!"

"And me, you miss..."

"Just call me Cathy, darling." My Mum said as she pulled away from Amelia.

It was weird seeing the two women you loved hug each other.

But it was nice, too.

"Ryan, we have so much to talk about but first, i'm so sorry." Mum said and rushed over to me. Her hands rested on my face and I noticed how skinny and small they were. "I'm so, so sorry I didn't talk to you or contact you, I am. I'm so sorry." She said. Her head rested on my chest briefly before she looked up. Her eyes were watery but she didn't let a tear fall. "You've grown into such a handsome young man. You're so big, too!" She exclaimed and moved away from me slightly. I laughed slightly. A grin threatened to show and I let it.

There was no point pretending not to be happy when I clearly was.

There were still secrets that needed to be unraveled, and questions that needed answering but in that moment I was more focused on that fact that my Mum was there. In the flesh. In front of me.

"I know, it's been such a long time." I said. She smiled at me sadly and gestured for everyone to sit down.

"I know sweetie. Do you all want to sit down so we can talk properly?" She asked. We all sat down. Amelia sat next to me and my Mum and Noel sat opposite us. I grabbed Amelia's hand under the table. My Mum and Noel held hands too, but atop of the table. "Let's get this bit over and done with so that we can focus on the happy stuff." She said and I nodded in agreement. "Ask me anything you want to Ryan, i'm going to be truthful to you." She encouraged and I nodded again.

"Okay. Why didn't you contact me?" I asked. It was a simple question but it held a thousand possible answers. I was too busy. I didn't want you to know I was sick.

I didn't want you in my life anymore.

"I was scared." She said and I looked at her, shocked.

"Of what?" I asked her. She sighed and gripped Noel's hand tighter.

"When I found out I was sick I knew that I wasn't in a fit state to look after Jade properly, and I knew that that meant I definitely wouldn't be able to look after you or travel to see you either. I figured, after I got better that you'd hate me. You'd hate me for abandoning you like that; even though i've done it before. I thought that maybe it was the last straw. I was scared that you'd be happier without me in your life; that you would be more content living with you Dad then if you had to worry about me all the time. I was scared i'd been replaced by someone better then me at being your Mum. I was a coward; but that stops now. I want you in my life Ryan. I know i've missed out on so much, so so much. But I want to make that up to you. I want to be your Mum again, even though I don't deserve to." She finished. She wiped a few stray tears and I swallowed. Amelia's grip tightened on my hand and I knew it was because the subject of Mum's was sensitive to her.

I wanted to make amends with my Mum for Amelia too. Not everyone had the chance to make things better with people that they loved; people that should be figures in your life. So I wasn't going to take talking to my Mum for granted.

"I understand. I'm sorry I didn't try harder to talk to you, either."

"You have nothing to be sorry for, Ryan." Mum reassured and I smiled gratefully at her.

"What was..." I cleared my throat. "What was wrong with you? What made you so sick?" I asked her. I wanted to know. I needed to, just incase it could have been something that could've come back. My Mum smiled at me.

"I had early stages of breast cancer. The doctors and I caught it early, really early and we managed to get rid of it within a year. We caught it before it spread and all of that." I swallowed.

That wasn't good.

"There's nothing to worry about now, though. The doctors have said that there is a very small chance it will come back in any form. But that wasn't the reason why I sent Jade away. The reason was that during, but mostly after the cancer, I had a slight breakdown. I was depressed. My kids didn't live with me and I had no love life. I started to go to therapy sessions, since sometimes it got so bad that I would just shut myself in my room for days. I didn't want you guys to be around that and so I sent Jade to live with Jack and I stopped contacting you. It probably wasn't the best way to go about things but it seemed like it at the time." She cleared her throat and wiped her eyes again.

I was shocked. I never expected her illness to be something like that. I didn't know what I expected it to be; but it wasn't anything of the sort.

"I started to go to group therapy sessions, people that went were from all kinds of dark places, there were alcoholics, drug addicts, depressed people, ill people, people that were grieving. It really helped. Then one day a woman walked in. She was about my age and came to sit next to me. She used to be depressed too. She was in a better place, a really good one, but still came to the sessions to help other's and to talk to the people she connected with whilst she was there. We became really good friends, and I started to become better. There was finally some light in my world, but it wasn't quite enough. The depression was still there. Then she introduced me to her brother, Noel." My Mum patted Noel's shoulder lovingly. "We connected really well. We got along and he treated me like a real person, not someone who was depressed. We started dating and everything went uphill from there. I'm in a better place now; I wanted Jade to stay with me again but she refused. I knew i'd hurt her by sending her away but I didn't really have a choice."

"She's actually staying with me at the moment. I bumped into her when she was playing a gig in our town a few days ago. She's the one that gave me your number." I mumbled and my Mum smiled at me.

"I'm really glad she did."

"I asked for it when I asked about you. She doesn't hate you; she's just confused about what she wants." I explained and my Mum nodded.

"I know, that's why i'm letting her do what she's doing. But enough about her and more about you. Do you have anything else you want to ask me?" Mum asked and I stopped. I thought about it for a moment before I shook my head.

"I think that's everything."

"Good. If there is anything else just ask, i'll be willing to answer it. But anyway, what about you, what are you doing now?" She asked me. She was still gripping onto Noel's arm but it didn't bother me as much.

He seemed like a good guy and if my Mum was happy with him then i'd let her be.

"I'm in my last year at 6th form. I'll be graduating soon." I said and she grinned.

"That's amazing! God, the time has flown by. You're what, 18 now?" She asked me and I nodded.

"Yeah I turned 18 a few weeks ago." I mumbled. The smile dropped from her face.

"I'm sorry I didn't send anything."

"It's okay. I wasn't expecting you too." I said. I realised after I said it that it hurt her but I was being honest. We couldn't build our relationship again on a bunch of lies.

"I'm sorry about that too. What are you studying?" She asked me.

"Engineering and maths." I answered. I didn't even like maths but it would be easier to get a job as an engineer with an A level maths degree than a GCSE.

"That's great! What about you Amelia?" She asked and looked at Amelia. Amelia suddenly looked nervous.

"Um, i'm in my first year at 6th form. I do PE and English."

"That's cool. So you're younger than Ryan?"

"Yeah, a year younger. I turn 17 in a few days."

"Well happy birthday for then." Noel said and Amelia smiled in thanks.

"What do you do?" I asked him and he smiled at me lazily.

"I'm a Lawyer."

"That's cool." I said. The oven dinged and my Mum jumped up.

"The pie's ready. I hope you guys are hungry."