09 - 08 - 15

"Ya, like two hours ago." I hear a voice. I try to open my eyes, but I'm too drained. I hear muffled voices for a while, but I end up falling asleep.

***

I open my eyes slowly and instantly feel a headache. I bring my hands up to my head, but I can't bend my left arm. Slowly opening my eyes again I look down at my arm. There is a bright purple cast on it. So, I did break it. I slowly sit up and feel a little sore everywhere. There is a needle in my arm and looking at it makes me nauseous. I pull it out without looking and get out of the white bed. I slowly make my way down to the cafeteria. Everyone's eating and I try to find Carol or Sam. I find Carol and start walking to her. "Hey." I say sitting down next to her.

"Why are you out of bed?" She asks concerned looking me up and down.

"Because I can walk just fine. Was I supposed to stay in bed?" I respond back.

"Just because you can walk doesn't mean you should be out of the bed. Sam will flip if you're not in there. He got food and went to see if you were ok." She says and I realize that everyone at the table is now looking at us.

"I'll go back to the room." I say and get up again. Why would he flip out? I'm fine to walk. When I get back to the bright room Sam almost runs into me.

"There you are. Why are you out of bed?" He asks like Carol did.

"I'm fine to walk." I say annoyed.

"Doesn't mean you should, didn't you get that from the IV." He says and moves out of the way of the doorway. I didn't really think of the IV, I just didn't want it in me. I huff knowing I won't win this and take a seat on the bed glaring at him.

"Happy?" I question.

"For now, oh and here is another new phone. You go through so many." He says and grins. I grab my phone and put it in my pocket. Before I can say anything back Ashley walks in.

"Your up?! Good!" She says and walks over to me quickly. Her voice was so high, it makes my head spin.

"When can I get out of this bed?" I ask her trying not to sound bitchy.

"Once I look you over and have a talk you're free to go." She responds and starts to look at the IV bag even though it's not in my arm. "When did you take this out?" She asks looking back at me.

"3-5 minutes ago." I say turning to look at her. She nods her head and writes on the paper.

"You're still dehydrated, but other than that you're fine now. Tomorrow you'll be right the way you were before, but take it slow today." She says and sends me like a motherly look. Surprisingly she doesn't mention anything about my wrists. I know she saw them, because she was probably the one to put the needle in. 

"I will." I say even though I probably won't.

"Good, now Jake wants to talk to you." She says leaving the room. This can't be good. I look over at Sam, but he's looking anywhere, but me. What did he-

"You told him." I say instead of a questioning it. Before he can respond Jake walks in.

"You young lady come with me," Jake says and starts walking out the door again. I quickly get off the bed and follow him. This isn't going to be fun. I can't blame Sam, he told me if I tried to leave again he would tell Jake. Stupid me getting caught.

We all walk down to his office. Jake first, me a few feet behind, and Sam about a yard behind me. Once we get to his office Jake sits behind the desk and motions for me to sit down. "I'm going to get straight to the point, Corrine. You need to stop running. If I have to I will put a tracker on you. I don't want to hear anything from you. You are going to accept our help and once I know you can handle being on your own I will let you leave. Am I understood?" He questions staring at me. It's weird having him be so straightforward with me. I stare back and nod my head. I may have to stay here, but I don't need to be nice or cooperate. I stand up and he says. "Good, now here's-" but I walk out of the room not listening. I'll be here, but I'll be a pain until he gives up. He won't put up with me for long.

I walk down the mundane hallways and out the doors to the swing. I take a seat and stare at the water. When someone gets hurt because of me it won't be my fault, I tried my best to leave, but they won't let me. Wrapping my arms around myself I listen to the woods and crashing of the waves.

***

"Hey." Sam's voice startles me a little, but I ignore him and continue to look at the lake. "Ugh, just let us be there for you. We aren't going to get hurt."

"I don't need anyone to be there for me and you have no clue what "he" will do or what I could end up doing." I say still staring away from him.

"When someone self-harms, can't sleep at night because of nightmares, doesn't feel safe ever, and can't control their gifts they do need help. I know you don't want it, but once you don't have any of those problems then you can leave." He says looking at me.

"I'm not something that needs fixing. Yes, I have problems, but I'm working them out without help." I say glaring back at him.

"No. What your doing is trying to hide away from them instead of dealing with them." He says like he's Mr. Know It All.

"You aggravate me you know that right," I say and he smiles.

"People have told me that, but in a way harsher tone and words." He says making my cheeks warm again. I turn and look back out at the lake. "You wanna go swimming?" He says smiling.

"It's like 6:00 and in September. Are you crazy?" I ask, buts it's more of a statement.

"But it'll be fun." He says standing up and pulling me with him.

"I don't have a swimsuit and my cast can't get wet," I say, but he keeps pulling me.

"Carol will have one that fits you and your cast is water proof, come on now it's Ashley." He says as we enter the building. He continues to pull me until we reach her room. "Carol?"

"Yeah?" She asks looking confused at us.

"Can you find a swimsuit for her to where?" He asks and Carol looks at me and nods.

"I'll find her one, go and get yours." She says pulling me into her room. She starts to go through a billion bags and that's not an exaggeration. "It's the only one that will fit you. Here's the over dress." She says handing me them. I look at the swimsuit and it's this really pretty blackish purplish color. It's a bikini though. I look up at her and she smiles. "Come on, you'll be fine."

"It doesn't cover anything though," I say looking at it.

"If you're in the water no one can see  and plus it's just Sam." She says and closes her door. Wonder where Matt is? "Change girl or I'll help you." She says and I start taking off my sweatshirt. I quickly put the swimsuit on and then the dress over it. "See beautiful." She says and then there is a knock at the door.

"Why are you in a swimsuit?" Matt asks looking up and down at me.

"She's going swimming, duh." Right then Sam comes back and says a thanks before pulling me outside again. I feel like a barbie doll.

When we get to the sand area, which took a lot of running he lets go of me. He puts both towels down and then runs in the water. "Come on it's not deep." He says swimming out more.

"Isn't it cold though?" I ask walking a little closer to the water.

"Not bad." He says before going under the water. I'm in a swimsuit might as well. I take the dress off and quickly run into the water.

"You liar, it's freezing!" I shout at him.

"You're a baby." He says and splashes me. I swim closer to him and then splash him back. "You're on." He says and then there is water going everywhere. I get tired and go under. The cold feels good on my body and I start to swim further out feeling the water go through my hair and across my body. The cast doesn't make my swim as smooth, but it's not as uncomfortable as I thought it was going to be. I pop back up because I was running out of breath and see Sam trying to find me.

"Over here, dummy." I say making him turn and looks towards me.

"How did you get all the way over there?" He questions and starts swimming.

"Fast swimmer and I can hold my breath for a while." I say shrugging my shoulders. He swims towards me and then stands up, brat. I can't touch so I'm treading water. He looks like he's about to say something when he jumps and screams. I raise my eyebrows at him. "What?"

"A fish. It touched my leg." He says and shivers. I bust out laughing. I try and float on my back, but I'm laughing too hard so I keep sinking. "There slimy and gross. Why are your laughing at me?" He asks as I try to stay afloat. I can't catch my breath though. He pulls me up towards him so I don't drown. I try and stop laughing, but I can't.

"It's- it's just a fish," I say as he holds my sides.

"It wasn't that funny." He says and looks a little embarrassed.

"You screamed like a girl, that's the funny part," I say sobered up from laughing.

"1..."

"What-"

"2..." Right as he says three I know what he's doing. Holding my breath he pushes me under. I pop up right away and glare at him. "Haha, payback." He says and I splash him. I try to push him under, but I'm weak and well he's not. "It's not going to work." He says looking at me. I give up thinking of another idea. I swim behind him and he doesn't move. I quickly hit his back leg and then plop on top of him. He goes under in surprise. I laugh at victory, but then he comes up right under me so I'm on his shoulders. He starts to walk out deeper.

"Sam, what are you doing?" I ask my hands on his head so I don't fall backwards. Being above the water makes me cold and the breeze isn't helping.

"Nothing." He says, but continues to walk out. It doesn't get too much deeper on him and then we both drop into the water. We pop up at the same time. "Found the drop-off." He says smiling at me.

"Why did I have to come with?" I ask coughing a little because of the water in my lungs.

"Because you kicked me and the sandbar isn't too far away. Come on." He says pulling me towards him. We both at start swimming towards the sandbar and it's like a little race because every time he went faster I did and vice versa. We make it to the sandbar at the same time. "Cheater." He says sitting on the sand.

"How can I cheat?" I ask and he thinks about for a moment.

"I'll think of something, just give it time." He says making me laugh. "Why do you continuously cover your mouth when you laugh?" He asks. I lay down on the sandbar with my arms holding me up, the waters about a foot deep on the sandbar.

"I don't know. I guess it's just a habit." I say and he lays down next to me.

"It's cute." He says making me feel warm again. I need to talk with Carol about this, but I don't know how she would respond.

"Thanks, I think. It's cute that you think fish are worth screaming for." I say laughing again.

"You're never going to let that one down are you?" He questions groaning.

"Nope." I say popping the p. He groans again. Then we just look up at the sky. "I see a bunny."

"What?" He asks and turns to look at me. I move closer to him and outline the bunny.

"It's a cloud bunny," I say and he nods turning his head.

"I see it now." We look for different things in the clouds for a while and have splashing wars.

***

"No that's so a princess," I say splashing him again.

"No, it's a frog." He says for the billionth time.

"Princess."

"Frog."

"Princess!"

"Frog!"

"No."

"Yes."

"No you blind hippo," I say making him sit up.

"I'm not that fat." He says pouting. I laugh and shake my head at him.

"You're not fat you dimwit," I say sitting up and looking at my stomach.

"What's with the harsh nicknames and don't even think about saying you're fat." He says and I look back up at him. How did he know?

"You're being mean and have you seen my stomach?" I say and he rolls his eyes.

"Skin rolls don't mean you're fat, they mean you need fat." He says standing up.

"Yeah ok." I say standing up after him.

"This," he says and points to my stomach "is just skin and bone. You're underweight which is the opposite of fat." He says and pushes my stomach a little to prove his point.

"I'm a girl, almost all of us think we are fat. I know I'm not majorly fat, but it jiggles." I say and move my hand against my stomach to make it move.

"It only moves because you touch it. If you jump it isn't going to move." He says shaking his head at me.

"Fine. I'm cold, race ya back." I say and then dive off the sandbar. I hear him yell something and try not to laugh. I have to resurface to take a breath, but once I do I go under again. I start to feel my muscles get tired and go back above water. I see Sam catching up to me and I start swimming again. I make it to where I can touch and run to the dry sand. Once I get to the sand I hear Sam running through the water after me.

"Haha, I beat you- Ahhh" I scream as he picks me up and spins me around.

"You cheated." He says and puts me on my feet. Me being me I stumble back into him.

"The world is still spinning," I say and he laughs holding me up. "And I didn't cheat, I just dove first," I say pulling back from him. He starts to talk, but I interrupt him. "What did you do?" I ask and run my finger around the red mark on his stomach.

"I can't dive, like at all." He says and I try and hide my laugh.

"So, you belly flopped into the water," I say removing my hand.

"Nooooo." He says and scratches his neck.

"Liar." I say back and grab my towel wrapping it around myself.

"Maybe." He says grabbing his. I shake my head at him and we start walking up to the building again.

Once we get into the building I grab clothes and run to one of the showers. I quickly take a shower and get dressed. I walk back to the room with the swimsuit in my towel and put it in a corner. I start looking for my brush and can't find it. "Where did I put it?" I mumble looking around the room.

"Watcha looking for?" I hear Sam ask.

"My brush." I say emptying my backpack again. Once everything is out I huff not seeing it. Once I put everything back I stand up frustrated. Running my hand threw my hair I look in the other clothes bags, but don't find it. "Well, I lost a brush," I say turning to Sam. He shrugs his shoulders. "I'll be back." I say and when I go to walk out the door I run right into Carol.

"Hey, come on." She says grabbing my good arm and then Sam.

"Where are we going?" I ask, but she doesn't answer. Then she pulls us into a biggish room. Alex, Maddy, Kevin, Matt, Becca, and John are in the room.

"Ready to play Jenga?" Alex asks smiling. I don't think this is normal Jenga. Carol pushes us into the room and we take the two open seats next to each other. Alex is on my left and Sam on my right.

"Ok this Jenga you pick one and try not to get it to tip, but you have to read the question on the wood and do it or answer it." Alex says to us. I nod my head a little nervous. "And if you knock it down we all get to chose a dare and you have to do it. If you're the final winner then you don't have to go through the last dares. I'll start." She says picking one. "Which player flirts the most? Matt." She says while putting it on the top.

"Hey-" but Carol interrupts him.

"We all know it's true." She says and he huffs.

"Maddy your turn," Alex says. Maddy pulls out one of the wooden pieces.

"Say something romantic to the person next to you." She leans into Matt and says something. His face turns a few shades of pink.

"Hey, we're supposed to hear," Alex says and Maddy shakes her head. "Fine. Matt your turn."

We play for a long time and now it's just Becca, Sam, and me. It's my turn and I carefully pull out the piece. "Sit on the lap of the person to your right, until your next turn. Really again." I say. This was the first one I picked when we started the game. I put it on the top of the tower and sit on Sam's lap. Becca grabs one shaking her head.

"Kiss the person on your left on the lips." She turns to Carol and kisses her. "Never thought I would kiss a girl, but ok." She says laughing. Carol laughs and then looks at Sam. Me being on his lap it's hard for him to get the piece.

"Don't make it fall." I taunt and he laughs while picking the piece and reading it.

"Tickle someone, your choice." He says and before I can do anything he starts tickling me. I yell at him to stop and he finally does.

"Meany." I say and pick another wooden piece. "Describe your worst moment at a party." Once I read it I regret it. I'll just have to make something up. "I fell into the pool and I was on my period without wearing a tampon. Worst thing ever." I say and everyone starts laughing. I try and smile even though there is way more to that. I remember I can get off Sam. I sit back in my seat and he watches me with a look asking, are you ok. I nod my head and then look at Becca. She pulls out one of the pieces and the whole thing falls down.

"Shit." She says and puts her hands to her face.

"Ok, what should we make her do?" Alex asks and everyone starts shouting things. "What do you think Corrine?" She asks turning to me.

I think before answering. "I think skinny dipping. You said you've never done it." I say smiling at her. She huffs and sends me a look saying she'll get revenge.

"Fine, but all the boys have to turn around." She says crossing her arms.

"Deal." I say and she gets up. We all walk to the beach waiting for her. She finally comes out with a towel around her.

"You guys suck." She says and the tells the boys to turn around. They all do and she walks down to the water. She quickly drops the towel and runs into the water. She screams that it's cold. She swims out until she can't touch and then comes back to shore. "Cold, cold, cold." She says running back into the building. We all laugh following her. Sam grabs my arm before I can catch up with the rest of them.

"Hey, you all good?" He asks concern in his eyes.

"Ya, why wouldn't I be?" I question even though I know he knows I'm lying.

"Because of that question." He says still holding onto my arm.

"Happened in the past. I'm fine, but thanks for asking." Before he can make me answer his question I pull from his arm and run back up to everyone.

Once we all get back into the room Becca sends me another look and I laugh. "Ready? Down to you two." Alex says and I look over at Sam. His mind is somewhere else, but he nods his head. "Sam you're first." She says and he picks one.

"What would be the dream date for the person on your right." He says and looks over at Kevin. We'd decided even if they aren't in the game anymore, we still go to whomever is to the right or left of us. "Umm. You being on the other side of the world breaking up with me." He says making everyone laugh. Kevin nods his head agreeing. I pick the next piece and groan.

"Spin around ten times fast. Come on I can barely walk." I say standing up and walking away from everyone. I start spinning and they all count. I get dizzy right away and by the time they say ten I fall out the door and then on my butt. Everyone laughs and Sam helps me up, but I still can't walk, so he puts an arm around me and helps me to my seat. "Stupid piece," I say while everyone's still laughing. Sam shakes his head at me before pulling another piece.

"Do an impression of a belly dancer. This is a stupid dare." He says and groans. Getting up he rolls his shirt up to his man boobs and sways his hips. We all laugh and I cover my mouth laughing again, I never realized I did it. He pulls his shirt back down and takes his seat next to me. I try to stop laughing, but can't. Sam looks over at me and smiles. I start taking deep breaths trying to stop, but I end up laughing again. I finally I stop laughing after like five minutes and pick a piece.

"Remove an item of clothing." I have a tank top on under so I take that off. It's not like I can take my sweatshirt off without others knowing about the cuts. As I put it next to me Alex grumbles at me.

"You're no fun." She says, but Carol, Matt, and Sam all send me different looks. I look over at Sam and he gets the hint to pick one. He reads it in his head and his face goes a little red.

"Kiss the person on your left on the lips." He says and looks over at me. My stomach turns in knots. Everyone in the room goes quiet and he puts the piece on top before looking at me again. He leans towards me and then kisses me. He stays there for like eight seconds and then pulls away, which I'm thankfully for because I could feel myself losing control. It's been so long since I have and Carol looks at me, but I wave her off. The feeling went away a once he removed his lips. Everyone, but Sam, Carol, and I clap and start talking. I pick a piece and read it out loud without reading it first.

"Describe your first kiss. Ha what a coincidence. Um, well you all just saw it so yea." I say feeling everyone's eyes on mine.

"That was your first kiss?" Becca says and I nod my head. "Wow, at least it was a good friend." She says and I laugh nodding my head. Sam picks another piece and reads it.

"Pick another block. Piece of crap." He says but does. "What's the best game you've played in the dark. Hide and go seek or kick the can." He says and our friends nod their head. What is kick the can? I don't want to ask, so I just pick a block.

"Sand up and sing a song." I groan and stand up. "Jingle bells..." I sing the whole song and then sit down. Everyone claps and I just shake my head.

"Blow in someone's ear." He says and leans towards me and does it. It tickles so I put my ear to my shoulder and rub it.

"It feels weird," I say making him laugh. I pick a piece and read it out loud. "Impersonate someone in the room." I stand up and put my arms over my chest in a confident way. "I don't care what you think of me, I'll do what I want when I want. And did I ask for your comment." I say and they say Alex's name. I nod my head and Sam picks a block.

"What's the worst thing your parents ever saw you do?" He says and thinks about it before answering. "Making out with a girl in my room and on my bed." He says and everyone ohs him. I pick the piece and it wobbles a bit but doesn't fall. Phew.

"I got the same one, the one where I had to describe the worst moment at a party," I say and put it on the top. If you got one that was like a question the group picks one person to ask you a different question. They pick John.

"Why are you so shy?" He asks and I shrug my shoulders.

"I don't see the point in talking to people I don't know, unless I have to." I say and everyone nods their head. Sam picks one and laughs.

"Favorite battery operated toy. Um, well a DS." He says and I roll my eyes. That can be a very bad question. I pick one and the thing wobbles again.

"Have you ever gone without underwear. Details, please." I read off the thing and put it on the top. "Yes and I forgot to do laundry, I just put sweatpants on," I say and Carol nods her head. She probably has done the same thing. 

Sam picks, "Imitate a pop or country artist." He starts to talk about all the boyfriends he's had, that he's blonde, and he's always heartbroken.

"Taylor Swift." Everyone, but me says. He sits back down and I pick one.

"Rub noses with someone in the room." I get up and walk to Carol and do it. The game goes on for a while longer until I pull the wrong one and it comes tumbling down at me. I bring my hands up as it falls. "I was so close though," I groan standing up and picking up the blocks. Becca sends me an evil smirk. I'm going to pay for making her go skinny dipping. Sam and John help pick up the blocks and put them into the box before joining in on what I'm going to have to do. They talk for a while, making me even more nervous.

"Ya, ya, ok." They say and look at me. "You have an extra penalty because you were close to winning. First one is you have to sit in a tub for ten minutes that is full of ice and cold water and the other one is you have to go without reading for two days." Normally the not reading for two days would be a blessing to most people, but to me that's like killing me.

"Two full days. Come one that's so not fair." I say and Becca smiles. This was her doing.

"Nope have to and now get into shorts and a shirt and into the tub next to this room." Alex says. I huff and Carol follows me to my room. I pull on shorts and then a long sleeved shirt. Carol laughs and we walk to the tub. It already has some water and ice and it looks cold. "Cheater that's long sleeved," Alex says but drops it thankfully.

"I hate you, Becca." I say and she grins back at me. Sam holds the towel for when I'm done and I watch as they all fill the tub. It only takes them a few minutes before they tell me to hop in. I put my right foot in and squeal.

As I slid down I keep saying "cold, cold, cold." They laugh as I lay in the water freezing. My clothes are drenched in water and my teeth are chattering. Becca is timing me and I swear time has slowed down. Only two minutes have passed and I feel like an iceberg. They all watch me and keep talking to me, but I just glare back. Once there are only 30 seconds left they start counting and I get ready to get out of the numbing water. "5...4...3...2...1.." I shoot out of the water and grab the towel wrapping it around my body. They all clap as I stand there shaking. We all say goodnight because it's past midnight and Sam walks me back to our room rubbing my shoulders.

"Your lips are still blueish." He says and I jump in place. He grabs me a pair of sweatpants, bra, underwear, tank top, and a sweatshirt before turning around.

"T-thanks." I say and grabbing the clothes. I quickly change and hang up the towel.

"Dressed?" He asks.

"Yeah." I say and he turns around and lays in the bed.

"Come on, it will help warm you up. You're still shivering." He says. I walk over and go under the covers. He pulls me to his chest and it's a lot warmer. I put my hands on his chest trying to warm them up. He rubs my back laughing a little. "Can't believe they made you do that for ten minutes." He says and I nod my head agreeing. I put my head down on his shoulder starting to feel warm.

"I knew it was bad, but really they had to bring my books into this." I say making him laugh more.

"That was all Becca." He says still rubbing my back.

"Kinda figured," I say and he moves his legs which touch my feet.

"Cold feet." He says and his body shakes a little.

"Cold feet, hands, arms, everything," I say and he looks down at me.

"You're not as blue in the lips now." He says and I lift my head up.

"What am I going to do tomorrow? I can't read." I ask and plopping my head down on the bed. He laughs and shrugs his shoulders.

"Lots of training." He says and I groan. "Oh and we get to start working out." He says making me groan louder. Tomorrow is going to be great.