---- [W -> D] ----

D: When your laughing really hard and your inner Kira shows
W: I still can't tell if this is a person you know or a split personality

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W: You awake?
D: No, I'm scuba diving, what the fuck do you want?

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D: So, Jason was fighting with the kid who lives across the street and all I heard was "Learn to take a joke!" and the Tim aggressively screaming back "LEARN TO MAKE ONE" and he's my new favourite person
W: I love this kid

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W: Simple and effective ways to deal with stress include;
W: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

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D: To quote Hamlet act III scene II line 92, "no."
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W: Do you ever just regret 40% of your life?

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D: Tomato
W:  Solanum Lycopersicum

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W: You are my hero
D: "Well, officer, if that's even your real name-"

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D: You have the social skills of a sea urchin

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W: Your music scares me
D: CUT MY LIFE INTO PIECES

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D: Find out who is playing that G note and destroy them 
W: Already on it

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W: Got your nose
D: Got your wallet

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D: Hey, don't look at me like that!
D: I'm relatable, not reliable!

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W: We got invited to two parties this weekend
D: Wow. We finally have friends  
W: Were skipping both, right?
D: Obviously  

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D: Is that really what you're going to wear?
W: I WAS ON MY DEATHBED

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W: I don't know what it worse
W: You whistled for me to come downstairs
W: Or the fact that I did

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D: Still waiting for you to apologize for what you did in my dream last night
W: Give me three minutes and I'll have flowers and tocos

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W: It's amazing how fast the world can go from bad to a total shit storm
D: I am literally three minutes late

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D: Candles are how we keep fire as pets
W: This is stupidly adorable

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W: Define "normal"
D: No
D: Suffer

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D: Well, what can I say? I'm a badass
W: YOU NEARLY KILLED ME
D: But you lived

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W: I love you, you enormously stubborn pain in the ass
D: Psh, you just want me for said ass

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D: Do I get bonus points if I act like I care?
W: I'm sure that the mayor of Gotham would appreciate your attention
D: Meh, this place hasn't had a good mayor since, like, season 3

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W: That's a little melodramatic, don't you think?
D: Leather pants and chocolate do not make me melodramatic
D: If anything, they make me mellodramatic

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D: Don't look for any redeeming qualities
D: I don't have any
W: Maybe not, but you always have the best one-liners

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W: No, your not listening dude
W: She's crazy, and just when you think you've reached the bottom of her craziness, there a crazy underground garage

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D: And you wonder why you're still single

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W: You seem all lollipops and rainbows but I know for a fact that behind closed doors your all leather and gun smoke
D: Now there's a book

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D: If my day gets any worse, I'm asking hell if they have an exchange program

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W: If we survive this, can we go home?

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D: Barbara was arguing with some chick and the girl insulted me and Babs said "Sorry, we don't speak skank" and left the room and everyone is still clapping
W: Tell Babs that I'm giving her my soul

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W: DID YOU JUST JUMP OUT OF THAT PLANE
D: Uh, yeah, duh

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D: This is a whole new level of moronic, even for you
W: How was I supposed to know that that's what would happen!
D: IT WAS FIRE

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W: I don't think I could ever stab someone, I mean, let's be honest, I can barely get the straw in the can
D: You'll never know unless you try

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D: My middle finger salutes you

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W: Somebody's cranky
D: Somebody needs to shut up

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D: Insanity runs in my family
W: Is that why you just poisoned cookies and mailed them to yourself?

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W: I heard that!
D: You were supposed to!
W: Thanks man, it means a lot
D: Your welcome bro

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D: I am one of the few people in the world who could murder you and leave no evidence behind
W: That's so romantic

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W: I'll need therapy after this
D: Dude, all we're doing is taking a bomb to space
D: No biggie

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D: Excuse me, I have to go make a scene

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W: Knew I shouldn't have lied
D: Hey, you didn't get in trouble for lying, you got in trouble for lying badly

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D: I turned out liking you a lot more than I originally planned
W: How comforting, but WILL YOU PLEASE PUT THE KNIFE DOWN

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W: I think you're crazy
D: I think you're boring

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D: If history repeats its self, I am so getting a dinosaur
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W: You really don't remember me?
D: You seem somewhat familiar, have I threatened you before?
W: Yes, but that's not the point

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D: Sarcasm is the body's natural reaction to stupidity
W: That does not give you permission to shoot the chief of police!

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W: I'm afraid I've been thinking
D: A dangerous pastime

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D: The female species is more deadly than the male
W: What happened
D: I just watched Barbara shoot a moving target with my sniper rifle from over 1000 yards away and she didn't even use a scope
W: I will never anger that women

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W: Well, excuse me, psychic wonder!

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D: YES, KNOCK HIS TEETH DOWN HIS THROAT
W: STOP TEXTING ME! IM IN THE MIDDLE OF A FIGHT

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W: Do I regret it? Yes. Would I do it again? Probably
D: Ain't nobody got time for regrets

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D: I'm not a damsel in distress
D: I'm a damsel doing damage
W: Your one hell of a damsel

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W: Neither of us is drunk enough for this conversation
D: Then take another shot

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D: Never take life seriously
D: No one ever comes out alive anyway
W: Are you at a poetry slam again?

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