---- [W -> D] ----

W: CANONNNNNNN

----

D: Its an Italian thing
D: U wouldn't understand

----

W: This is the worst training ever
D: Why because the villains are attacking?
W: No because its a little humid- YES BECAUSE THE VILLAINS ARE ATTACKING

----

D: 'I know how to give a good time.'
D: Really? What am I, a hooker?

----

W: Dickie, I need a favour
D: Twenty dollars
W: I just want to talk
D: Okay, ten dollars

----

D: Shut up
W: I didn't say anyth-
D: You were thinking. It's annoying

---- [The Three Muskequeers] ----

W: Dick.
D: Wally.
R: Roy.
D: Okay, you just said your own name
R: It was the only one left

---- [W -> D] ----

D: AHHHH! MY LILLY WHITE SKIN! WHAT IS THAT THING?!
W: It's the sun
D: Why isn't it covered by clouds?!

----

W: No hetero, bro

----

D: In loving memory of when a fuck was given

----

W: When the apocalypse comes I'm heading to IKEA and rebuilding society one chair at a time

----

D: When be a wife when you could have a knife

----

W: My love for licorice is stronger than my love for you
D: No it's not
W: You're right, it's not

----

D: It's broken. Like my dreams.

----

W: Step one, be straight
D: ?
W: Step one, failed

----

D: I can't take this anymore, someone needs to take me out!
W: In a dating way or an assassination type way?
D: I don't know, surprise me

----

W: You say 'fight me' a lot for someone whos like 5'4 and has a hard time opening some doors because they're too heavy
D: The fuck did you just say? Fucking fight me!

----

D: Bruce said if I ever played it again he'd kick me out of the house but guess whos not here

----

W: Dude Hal came over and he and uncle Barry keep giving each other looks, but when I looked at Iris she was looking at them both and I've discovered things I never wanted to know

----

D: Three different straight couples broke up at Ivy and Harley's wedding so when you say "gay marriage isn't a threat to straight marriage" all I hear is your not really trying

----

W: What is your preferred method of transportation?
D: Carried by servants

----

D: IS SOME PASTA TOO MUCH TO ASK FOR?!?!

----

W: Listen, in this community its gay until proven straight

---- [The Three Muskequeers] ----

D: Roy
R: Son
D: Don't call me your fucking son
R: Um, language?
D: Right. Sorry.
D: Please don't call me your fucking son
R: Better.

----

R: Wally,
R: When the fuck did you learn how to do a cartwheel?
W: Dickie taught me
R: Dick,
R: How the fuck did you teach Kid Klutz to do a cartwheel
D: Believe me, it wasn't easy

---- [W -> D] ----

D: SO
D: Timmy got himself kidnapped because he's a fucking idiot
D: And the bad guy calls Babs up like "Hey, I have your son"
D: And Babs is like "I don't have a son"
D: "Then who just asked for coffee and made us cut the crust of his sandwich?"
D: And Babs looks up, "Oh my god, you have Timmy"

----

W: I'm sweating like a bitch

----

D: It was at this moment that he knew
D: He was gay
D: So damn fucking gay

----

W: You know what you need?
D: A gun?

----

D: I'm taking a break!
W: You haven't started yet!

----

W: So it really wasn't you?
D: Nope, I didn't even know until Bruce told me this morning
W: Huh
W: I guess I'm transferring to Gotham Academy then?
D: Yeah, 'cause you're a science nerd
W: Hi, pot? It's kettle

----

D: Hey, you know whos gay?
D: Us

----

W: Will you marry me?
W: Or at least be in an unfulfilling relationship with me for seven months?
D: Hey, what's the difference?

----

D: I WILL GO DOWN WITH THIS SHIP

----

W: Isn't it great how we can text in italics, underline and bold?
D: I know right?

----

D: I was walking down the street, holding my black tea boba
D: And this bitch- ohh nononono- this bitch had the nerve
D: The audacity, to touch my motherfucking hair
D: Do. Not. Touch my hair.
D: No, okay?

----

W: Dude, Barry and Iris and Hal aren't home
W: Bring your trombone

----

D: Segways are to hoverboards, as scooters are to skateboards

----

W: Where's Roy?
D: Sleeping, probably. It's his hobby.

----

D: Why is there a normal-sized carrot in the bag of baby carrots?
W: They need adult supervision

----

W: What the fuck are you doing?
D: Hardcore Club Penguin fishing

----

D: You want some leftovers?
W: What's that?
D: You've never had leftovers?
W: No, cause I'm not a quitter

----

W: I told you to bring warmer clothes, but you said that you were already a 'frigid bitch' and didn't need anything to fight off the cold

----

D: Someone put a to-do list on the fridge and like, the third thing down is 'get bitches'

----

W: John Mulaney or Bo Burnham?
D: *John Mulaney x Bo Burnham

----

D: Quit school
W: Why
D: Join my emo band
W: Kay

---- [The Three Muskequeers] ----

W: You know Dickie, words ending in 'ie' are so sweet
W: Like sweetie, cutie
D: And Cookie!
R: And die

---- [W -> D] ----

D:  I'm always straight.
W: Man, that's the biggest lie you've ever told

----

W: I was gonna say "what would you do if we were dating?" But like it's canon now so
D: I would, out of the kindness of my heart, allow you to put your hands on my ass.
W: Oh my god, I'm so glad we're dating

----

D: 'I Don't Dance' from the absolute masterpiece that is High School Musical 2 is the greatest love song ever written.

----

W: What an overly complicated way to get viola. Everyone knows you only need to take a violinist and subtract the giant ego
D: several people are typing

---- [The Three Muskequeers] ----

D: Conner looked at me the way all women want to be looked at.
W: Aww
D: With fear in his eyes
W: ...
R: Aww

----

R: Hey Wally, do you want to know how I actually hurt my wrist?
W: Yes.
R: I was hula hooping. Dinah and I attend a class for fitness and for fun.
W: Oh, my God.
R: I've mastered all the moves. The pizza toss, the tornado, the scorpion, the oopsie-doodle.
W: Why are you telling me this?
R: Because no one will ever believe you.
W: You sick son of a bitch!

---- [W -> D] ----

D: You're late!
W: You're stunning.
D: You're forgiven.

----

W: Are you out of your mind?!
D: Yes, completely, but that's not a recent thing.

---- [The Three Muskequeers] ----

R: When I'm not here, do you guys braid each other hair and debate who's the coolest Jonas brother?
D: No. But its totally Nick
W: Absolutely Nick

---- [W -> D] ----

W: He knows when you are sleeping
W: He knows when you awake
W: So do your Spanish lesson
W: To keep your family safe.
D: Jokes on you, I'm already fluent in Spanish so I don't need Duolingo

----

D: Do you ever think about the future?
W: Sure I do
D: Am I in it?
W: You are 'it'.

----