Taylor P.O.V.

Every day I still remembered the death of my mother, who I had lost ever since being a little kid. Not having much life to cling onto back then, I never really reacted much to the day I had lost her. Then, I was completely disconnected from the world. Lost in the brink of insanity, feeling like I was drowning in never ending darkness and depressing thoughts. Because I was broken at such a young age, already suffering from severe depression as a child, I had given up on my whole life, believing nothing good would ever come along for me.

I was mistaken that things would never be okay again. Sam had pulled me up from that endless suffering, and aided me every day that I spent with her. Always, she had just been the best, listening, caring... Just being amazing. She seemed so happy, so joyful. So... Full of life. There was nothing more heartbreaking than slowly seeing her unravel before my very eyes the more and more I saw her. I knew with her mother's declining health, life for her at the moment was just exhausting. Instead of being that happy joyful girl I had come to know her as, she was slowly becoming the complete opposite. 

It was the hurtful truth, but unfortunately it seemed like her mother wasn't going to get better. And knowing that is what I knew was breaking up Sam the most. She hated to see her mother changing into a completely different person before her eyes the more she went to visit her. She didn't want to lose her mom, that was very clear to me. And I wanted to do all I could to possibly aid her and be there for her. However, apart from giving her hugs, kisses, and comforting words, there wasn't much I could do. I didn't have super powers. I couldn't just click my fingers and make all the problems go away. I couldn't just suddenly make her mom better, as badly as I wanted to.

Anyway, there was just one day, where Sam's world likely came crashing down all around her. And I tried my hardest to be there for her as she needed a shoulder to cry on. You see, this was about maybe a couple of weeks later. I was actually with Sam in hospital at the time, as she wanted to see her unwell mother, despite how much upset and stress it appeared to cause her. No matter what, she always told me "I won't stop being at her side no matter what, even if she doesn't remember me." It was sad to see, but also it just showed what kind of person Sam was. She obviously cared for her mother. She wanted to hold onto her desperately before she slipped away from her grasp. Gone away in a single moment, like whispers in the wind. 

So strange... How one day, someone can just be there. And we take it for granted. We never imagine the days where one day, they will no longer be at our side. They won't be able to take care of us, laugh with us, or spend time with us anymore. You won't ever see that person again, as instead this world has decided  to take them away from you. 

Back to being in the hospital, we had been standing outside her mother's room for about five minutes, as Sam was extremely hesitant to go inside, with a bouquet of flowers sitting in her grasp to hand to her mother who probably wouldn't even recognise her. I remained at her side, just like I promised. I never wanted her to feel like she was alone. I never wanted her to suffer alone in pain, feeling like she had no one to go to. Feeling like the only person she had was herself, and that she would be trapped inside her own mind with her own thoughts. 

Slowly, she pushed open the door, seeing her mother who appeared to be asleep. And for a second, Sam had smiled. I had smiled. However, something was awfully wrong. And it only took a couple of seconds for either of us to notice that, thanks to the heart monitor beside her mom's bed. Just as we had entered the room, it had stopped. Almost as if the world had just sensed them coming and thought "Fuck you", not giving Sam a chance to say goodbye. Dropping the bouquet of flowers, Sam practically screamed at the top of her voice as she rushed to her mother's side. That without a doubt got nurses and doctors running.

"Mom! Please, don't leave me! Please!" Sam had begged, while the nurses and doctors who had come into the room were trying to usher her away, and she just continued to scream and plead, wanting to stay at her mother's side. But they wouldn't let her, and unfortunately as we had to listen to the rules, I had to pull Sam back. She tried to fight and struggle against me, telling me to "get the fuck off" and in all honesty, I felt terrible. I wanted to let her remain at her mom's side, but we simply weren't allowed. 

Once Sam had stopped yelling at me, she soon just broke down, clinging to me desperately as she sobbed her heart out. I had nothing to say. All I could do was hug her close to me as she cried and screamed, clearly feeling regretful as she hadn't even got to tell her mom goodbye. I was just wishing with all my life that maybe they would be able to revive her mom, that they would be able to bring her back. Maybe she wasn't going to die, and she would be okay. 

After what felt like an eternity of waiting, the door soon opened slightly as a doctor stepped out, and Sam looked towards him, wanting only good news. To her misfortune, the doctor sadly shook his head, all while saying the cliche line of "I'm so sorry for your loss." but Sam didn't seem like she gave a shit. Instead, she took off  running down the hall, and I could only stand in shock, not sure what to do. 

"Sam!" I yelled after her, quickly taking off into a sprint in the hope to catch up. God damn was she a fast runner; by the time I had gotten out of the hospital, she was completely gone from my sight. Where in the world would she have possibly run off to? My first instinct told me to check if she had ran off home, thinking that maybe that's where she would be. To no luck. When I knocked on her door a couple of times, I got no answer. And I didn't feel like she would be ignoring me like this. If anything I had felt sure she'd come running into my arms if she knew I had come after her.

"Where have you run off to, Sam...?" I muttered to myself in slight panic, just wanting her to be okay. What if she ran off and wasn't looking where she was going when she was crossing the road and she got hit by a car or something? What if she ran off to a destination where she wasn't sure where she was even headed and she ended up getting lost? Due to all these thoughts, I decided to call her mobile, to no avail. She wouldn't answer.

What in the world... Where could she have gone? Surely, she couldn't have gotten far right? And in that moment, that's when it clicked with me. The tree. The one we had agreed we would meet at whenever we wanted to hang out. My gut told me that perhaps she had ran off there. That had to have been where she had gone. I couldn't possibly see her going anywhere else. 

So, I headed towards the park, feeling like my lungs were on fire by the time I had arrived, as I had chosen to run the entire way there. It had been utterly exhausting; Sam's well being was more important to me though. More important to me than my own. And to my luck, I found her exactly where I could have hoped, at that tree, with her knees curled up against her, her face buried in her arms as she hugged her knees close.

"Sam..." I muttered, stepping close to her.

"Go away!" She yelled, not even bothering to look up. At her harsh tone, I did hesitate for a second. Instead of listening to her command, I took another step towards her, until I slowly knelt down and I went to wrap my arms around her in a caring, loving embrace. When I did this, she did try to struggle against me and push me away, as she cursed and swore up a storm. Eventually though, she gave in to the hug I was giving to her, and soon she burst into tears once more, while hugging me back in return.

There wasn't really much I could say to her. So, instead, I stayed like this with her. I could hug her for all eternity if I had to, if it meant that it would make her feel better at all.