Chapter 1

I first met Finn at twelve o’clock; at first I thought I was seeing things when he started to approach me.

No one’s on the street at this hour .

I thought to myself as Finn loomed out from the dark street corner. My first instinct was to run, because hey, no normal person walks around town at twelve o'clock. As far as I knew the only people who walked the streets at night were thieves, the heart sick, the addicts, and the restless, and quite frankly I wasn’t in the mood to face any person that fell into those categories.

But I didn’t run. I think my choice not to run down the street screaming “bloody murder” had half to do with the fact that I was tired and half to do with the fact I knew no one would hear me.

The moment I saw Finn’s face emerge from the dark shadows of the night was the moment I regretted staying. I knew who he was, most people would. His name was Finn Wehr, and along with having one of the coolest names ever he was from Canada which automatically made him beloved by every kid in Marbury, Pennsylvania.

When he came closer to me, I saw something, something other than his one hundred and one wat smile. I saw his eyes, and it was weird, because I never noticed they were just like mine; tired.

“ Hey.” And though it was a greeting he had this odd way of making it sound like a goodbye.

“restless.” I thought to myself. “ He’s definitely restless.”

He looked at me funny when I didn’t answer.

“ Your Edith right?” I nodded quietly suddenly tugging my shorts down. “ I remember you from last year, you were in my..bio...no, it was english, oh yeah, you're the girl who read like, five books a week right.”

I smiled slightly.

“ One each day.” I whispered.

He laughed, like it was the funniest thing he had ever heard. Side effect of sleep deprivation.

“ You know I really wasn’t expecting to see anyone around until August, most my friends go on vacation this time of the month.” I nodded as if I completely understood what he was talking about. I didn’t really have any friends, of course I had people I would occasionally exchange a “hey” with in the hallway, but other than that I had never really been able to pass the rudimentary of a casual conversation.

He stared at me for a few seconds, before smiling as if every bone in his body was breaking. His one hundred and one wat smile looked so full of hurt that it was cringe worthy. I tried not to cringe, but if I did, I decided to blame it on the cool July air.

“ So what are you doing on the streets at twelve at night?”  His voice was quieter than it had been before. I rubbed my hands over my bare thighs looking at the empty street.

“ I guess I could ask you the same question.” I replied even though I knew the answer.

“ Can’t sleep.” He shrugged to himself and I saw something flicker in his eyes. Was it sadness? Embarrassment maybe?

“ Me too.” I said so softly it was almost a whisper. He nodded and when his eyes met mine I understood. He was just like me.

“ Do you um- I mean the streets pretty short- maybe we could um.” I stared at him restlessly as he scratched his head. “ Walk with me?”

He was beautiful. So naturally I said yes.

We walked longer than he said we would, sharing our stories of our restless nights.

“ I haven’t slept in three days.” He said rubbing a hand over his tired face. “Walking down the streets is the only way i’m functioning.”

“ It helps.” I said a little more quiet. “ Walking I mean, it helps.”

“ When was the last time you slept?” I looked at my feet for a moment before meeting his eyes. His tired eyes.

“ Last Thursday.” I answered. He looked at me, and for once I felt like someone was actually seeing me, and somehow he made me feel like I was no longer invisible.

He didn’t stop staring until I smiled at him. After that he shook his head, allowing his hair to whip in his face from his nose then back to his ears.

“ It’s funny.” He said looking down the end of the road  where the street lights looked like tiny constellations. “ I never thought I’d meet another one.”

“ Another one?” I looked at him curiously.

“ I mean someone like me, someone who can’t sleep.” I laughed quietly, before looking up at the sky,

“ There are a lot of people who can’t sleep, I bet most of them are looking at the moon.” He looked up, staring at the moon for a few seconds, before glancing back down.

“ I bet they are.” Then we walked in complete silence, both lost in our own minds.

We stopped walking at three o’clock in the morning. When he told me had to leave his face filled with this weird regret.

“ I had fun.” He said shoving his hands in his pockets. “ Not many girls like walking around empty streets all night.”

I laughed.

“ Well if you ever need a buddy I’m always here.” He stared at me, smiled then turned around, and walked away.

I watched him walk down North Bridge Road, and once he was out of sight I slapped myself on the head.

“ If you ever need a buddy?” I repeated what I had said out loud to myself. “ Really Edith, who say’s buddy anymore?”

I hadn’t expected to see him after that night, because I was absolutely certain the famous Finn Wher had better things to do than waste his nights walking around with a girl named Edith who uses the word buddy. But sure enough he was in the exact same place he had been the night before, and when he saw me walking up the street he smiled. His smile was tired, and so were his eyes, but for some reason his lips looked oddly awake, and I soon felt this weird want to kiss Finn Wher on the mouth.

“ Well look who came back.” I blushed. I guess that was what Finn’s voice did, it made you feel all girly inside until your face turned red.

“ Here I am.” But even though I tried to sound attractive, my voice came out squeaky and my neck came out a bit too much.

He looked at me with a raised eyebrow for a second before breaking out into a smile.

“ Want to walk?” He said after what seemed like minutes of smiling at me.

“ Mhm.” I nodded fast and found my feet walking faster.

“ Woah.” I felt Finn grab my hand and spin me around, and suddenly my mind thought about how he should kiss me, but he didn’t. “ When I said ‘want to walk’ I meant with me.”

Before I continue let me enlighten you on the side effects of insomnia

First of all there is the Lack of Concentration. As I so stupidly decided to display in front of Finn, that second night. Then there's the Irritability. It’s almost like there’s a ticking time bomb in your mind.One minute you think you’ve cut the right wire but the next thing you know your brains bursting out into flames. Then there’s the most unnecessary side effect, an abnormal sense of creativity. I don’t know why, but for some reason, when you're not too busy yelling at strangers or embarrassing yourself in front of cute boys, insomnia gives you flashes of creative moments when you least expect. Then Lastly there’s the worse side effect. The anxiety. Thoughts about being left alone, fear of never being able to sleep again or always being left behind when the world is asleep rush through your mind, and the worse part is, no matter how many pills you take or screams you release, you can’t stop it.

Anyway, where was I, oh yeah

“ When I said ‘want to walk’ I meant with me” And once again my knees became all wobbly and my cheeks become dark pink.

“ Oh,” I fought a smile. “ With you.”

He smiled a little.

“ I mean if that’s okay with you.”  I looked down smiling in hope he wouldn’t see.

“ Yes, that’s okay.” He laughed a little before starting up the road. I followed.

“ You know.” I said after a few minutes of walking. “ You’re really happy for someone who hasn’t slept in 3 days.”

“ Four,”  he corrected me, with a slight smile on his face. “ And why wouldn’t I be?”

I shrugged, “ Most people who don’t sleep tend to be petulant.”

“ What?”

“ Petulant… it’s like irritable.” He made a face before smiling again.

“ You use big words.”

“ Petulant isn’t that big.” I said quietly.

“ See that’s what someone who uses big words would say.” He laughed a bit, before stopping and looking at me.

I shifted uncomfortably under his gaze

“ You’re quiet you know.” I rubbed my arms. “ And squirmy too.”

“ I am not.” I whispered weakly.

“ Are too.” He laughed a little poking my stomach.

“ Am not.” I said a little louder.

“ Are too.” He sang, shoving his hands in his short pockets. “ But it’s okay,I bet you’ve got a lot going up in there, most quiet people do.”

I smiled softly, but only to myself.

“ You should smile more too.”