First Encounter

He inhaled slowly, his system responding to the smoke, and he felt his lungs being wrapped by a warm blanket. Taking small, slow draws of the cigarette, he felt delighted, like he had never felt before. Edward was freezing , but the view took his breath away. Up here, it's like looking down at the world. You can see the trees, the flowers, and the many busy people going on about the day. Up here it's like standing on a giant's back exploring the world with awe.

It's nice to sit up here , he thought.
It gives him time to think about everything and anything.

He has realized that everything has changed , pain changes everything; people , point of views even the streets .

There is misery in these streets. It has soaked into the sidewalk cracks and into the graffitied walls. It is in the back alleys where the few restaurants who persist in trading have their garbage searched several times a day, and not just by the cats. It is etched in every gaunt and dejected face that has given up on life getting any better than mean survival on mean streets; and those faces become more ubiquitous with each passing year. Some sleep in the streets rather than take the bed bugs in the shelters, some cling to their holy books as their last hope for something better; not in this life of course, but after they pass of pneumonia or some highly treatable infection. We have become garbage - damaged bodies and damaged minds. Each one of us has a story that could snap our heart in two, so don't ask. Pass through with your windows up, doors locked, music on .  .  .

Nothing is absolute , Everything changes , Everything moves , Everything revolves, Everything flies and goes away , except him.

This feeling is strange; too familiar yet too strange. He never knew how to define it. He wanted to smile, laugh along with everyone but something in him grabs his heart tight, crushes it to pieces. The brightness inside of him is gulped by something dark. No, He would be wrong to say it is dark - it is empty, nothingness . He is one of many in the world and the world is full of interesting things to see, to touch to feel, to keep his mind anchored in time and space. But as the white flakes whirl around him in an angry vortex He was alone as He would be in the bleakness of space and cold, so cold. He reach out with gloved hand to guide his way but it is swallowed before it has gone even a few inches. To save his eyes from the blinding white He must narrow them until they are almost shut, and all the while the wind rages without end, only reducing its ferocity long enough to gather the strength for another attack. All his heart can do is beat warm blood around his veins in a hope that the storm will end, all his mind can do is plan the most logical path to warmth, safety and to something more tangible than light and snow.

He couldn't live like this anymore ; half alive and half dead.

Ed started walking towards the final step of stepping off the roof.
With every step he takes he remembers approaching her , his warm hand falling softly on her cold skin. The memory flashes in his mind like it was yesterday . The way her heart stopped beating , and the way the light left her green eyes forever.

He closed his eyes and let the cold breeze touch his skin. The green eyed guy kept swaying back and forth , and forgot that he might fall in any minute.

Suddenly he let go of everything that is bothering him along with overlooking his boring life. He didn't care about the air that speared through his coat and prickled along his skin; sinking down to his very bones. He felt inner peace that he craved for a long time .

But it was all over when he the air blew him away to the edge of the roof .

Only one step to heaven.

Falling on his own , No one surrounds him ; just the air and the view .

But there was still a bright star in the dark sky ; hope .

" What the hell are you doing ? Are you mad ?" The brunette shouted from the other building.

She was the tiny star in his dark universe.

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