#COMM

Chapter 48

"Let's just tell him—" I said. I already lost track of time. We're here, sitting on the sofa, looking at each other. Jasper's sporting that look of fear on his face. Hindi ko alam kung bakit natatakot siya. We're just gonna tell JJ that we're already back together. If anything, I was pretty sure that JJ's gonna be happy with that.

"Maybe talk to him first," he said.

I arched my brow. "About what?"

"Me. If it's okay with him..."

I let out a laugh. "Jasper, he's your son. And seriously, kayang-kaya mo ngang tirisin si JJ! Why are you so afraid of him?" natatawang tanong ko. Iniwas ko iyong tingin ko sa biceps niya. Ugh! Since we're back together, pwede ko na ba ulit na hawakan iyon? Jasper didn't know, but I dreamed about his biceps! It was so weird! As in iyong biceps niya lang minsan ang napapanaginipan ko! Hindi kasama iyong mukha or anything—tanging biceps niya lang.

Jasper looked at me like I just suggested the most horrifying thing there was. "You're really crazy, you know that?"

I stuck my tongue out. "You just cried to get this craziness back, Jasper. Who's crazy now?"

A smile slowly dawned on his face. Nagulat ako nang hatakin niya ako palapit sa kanya. I quickly felt his arms wrapping around me like he didn't want to let go. I bit my lower lip when I felt him kissing the top of my head.

"I love you," I heard him whisper.

I clutched my hands against his chest. "I love you, too, First Lieutenant."

"I quit already."

"I know. But you're still my First Lieutenant."

He kissed the top of my head again. "And you're still my Ma'am," sabi niya tapos kinilig ako. Ugh! I didn't want to tell him, but it really makes me feel hot whenever he'd call me Ma'am. But I didn't want to have kids with him again yet! Gusto ko magbond muna sila ni JJ... And Kylie pa. If Jasper's gonna push through with the adoption, I needed to make Kylie like me... I'd love her like she's my own.

"I have to go to the market pa," I told him after we hugged for minutes. Nagugutom na ako. I was pretty sure gutom na rin si JJ, but because he's dramatic, hindi siya maka-labas sa room to ask for food.

Jasper stood up. "What do you need? I'll buy. Just try to get our son out of the room," he said, and I wrinkled myself because I felt kilig nang sabihin niyang our son. I mean, sinasabi niya naman na iyon before... iba lang ngayon kasi okay na kami ulit...

"What?" he asked.

"Nothing," I said, shaking my head. "Just ask what the ingredients are for Sinigang?" Gusto ko kasi na masanay si JJ na kumain ng Filipino food. Sa unit kasi ni Addie, puro delivery lang din kami...

Jasper nodded. I bit my lower lip dahil nagdala pa siya ng eco-bag bago siya lumabas. My environment-caring ex-soldier.

When Jasper was out, pinuntahan ko na si JJ. The door wasn't locked. I saw him lying on his bed.

"Jasper Jr," I called him.

"What?"

"Are you still mad?"

"Depends..."

"Depends on what?"

Naupo siya. He was looking at me, his arms crossed over his chest. Pinipilan ko na matawa because he seemed really serious.

"I only want my Daddy, Mommy. I'm mad at him now, but he's my only Daddy."

Kumunot ang noo ko. "O...kay?"

"Can you please fix your problem with him, Mommy?" he asked, looking at me with his round eyes. "But if you really can't..." he said, sighing. "It's okay. I'd rather not have a complete family than to see you two fighting always."

My lips parted. Sometimes, I felt like I was talking to a much older person whenever JJ's being like this... Hindi ko alam if it's because kaming dalawa lang sa Paris before kaya ang bilis niyang nagmature... but I wanted him to be a kid. I wanted him to have a normal childhood. I didn't want him to have problems like this one.

Naupo ako sa tabi niya. I messed with his hair. "Baby..." I called. "Your Daddy and I are okay."

His face lightened. "Really?"

I nodded. "When we go back to Manila, we're gonna live with him."

"But what about Aunt Helene?" tanong niya. "And Kylie?" he asked in a much lower voice.

I looked at him. "Well... if your Dad's gonna adopt Kylie, is it okay with you?" I asked. He looked at me like he wasn't full able to comprehend what I just said. "If Kylie's gonna be your sister... if she's gonna live with us, is that okay?"

"Where is her Mommy?"

My heart began to ache, but I put on a brave face in front of JJ. I didn't want to involve him in the past. I struggled so hard to run away from that...

"Her Mommy's gone... And so is her Daddy... So, if it's okay with you, your Daddy's gonna be her Daddy... And if she wants, I can also be her Mommy," I explained. I could feel my heart beating erratically as I waited for his answer. As much as I wanted to adopt Kylie, I wanted to put JJ's needs first... I wanted him to be okay with this. His needs come before anything else.

"Hmm... okay. I can share," sabi niya. I immediately pulled him into a hug. "Mommy!" reklamo niya, but I didn't let go. He's really the biggest blessing I got in my life!

* * *

JJ and I played while we're waiting for Jasper. Kung hindi pa ako lumingon sa pintuan, 'di ko pa mapapansin na kanina pa pala siya doon. I stood up and helped him with the bags he's carrying.

"Kanina ka pa?"

He nodded. "Yeah..." he said, trying miserably to hide the smile on his face. I smiled at him, too. I knew what he was feeling because that's exactly what I was feeling. I love us being like this... Masaya ako na pamilya na kami... This was perfect. This was home.

"I talked to JJ," sabi ko habang sinusundan ko siya papunta sa kusina.

"And?" he asked. Even with a single word, I could feel how nervous he was. Lihim akong napa-ngiti. Our little guy really got Jasper wrapped around his fingers.

"Before I even told him about us, he told me that you're his only Daddy," sabi ko sa kanya. Kita ko iyong muling pagpipigil ng ngiti ni Jasper. But my First Lieutenant was quick to make his face passive again. Arte talaga. Alam na kung saan nagmana si JJ. "And he's okay with Kylie."

"Really?"

I nodded. "Yeah. But I think you should talk with Helene first... maybe she wants to take care of Kylie," sabi ko. Syempre, Kylie's her niece... With her sister gone, she only has Kylie left... Hindi ko alam kung papayag ba siya na ganitong kukunin ni Jasper si Kylie.

After that, Jasper and I cooked. I really didn't know how to cook sinigang dahil wala namang ganyang ingredients sa Paris. But I could vaguely remember how it was cooked. Napa-ngiti na lang ako. I remember watching Manang as she cooked our meals since Jasper's really paranoid about what he eats.

Good times.

"Jasper," I called. "Kellan and Nico... where are they?" I asked.

I tried to look calm, but deep inside, I was worried. Hindi ko pa talaga tanggap iyong nangyari kay Evan... Kinakabahan ako kung ano ang nangyari kina Kellan and Nico... I hope they're fine...

Jasper was stirring the pot. "They're still with PSG. They're with your brother."

"Sino'ng kapatid?" I asked. Alam niya naman na marami akong kapatid! I hope hindi kay Psalm because papasakitin ni Psalm ang ulo nilang dalawa. It's much better if si Cohen because I think sa aming magkakapatid, siya ang pinaka-madaling bantayan.

"Cohen."

I heaved out a sigh of relief. While I was waiting for Jasper to finish cooking, nag-isip na ako. Okay na kami ni Jasper... Maybe it's time for me to finally introduce JJ to the family... Alam naman na ng parents ko... I just have to woo my brothers because I was pretty sure that they'd be a bit mad dahil hindi nila alam iyong about kay JJ...

I have a lot of people to meet. I needed to meet the whole family. I needed to talk to Kellan and Nico. And si Kylie. I have a lot to do, but it made me happy... It made me feel like I was finally home. For real.

"JJ, food' ready," I called. He quickly shuffled towards us. He looked at the food weirdly. "Your Dad cooked."

"What's that?"

"Sinigang."

"Sinigang?" inulit niya. He should start learning Filipino. It's my fault. I only talked to him in English while we were in Paris. He only knows English and French. Abuelo's gonna get mad na hindi sanay si JJ magsalita ng Spanish.

JJ found the taste weird at first, but since he's Filipino, he later on enjoyed it. Kaming dalawa lang ang kumakain because Jasper's just awkwardly staring at us. Nailang tuloy akong kumain dahil pinapanood niya kami! This was probably how he felt back then nung ako naman iyong sobrang fascinated kapag kumakain siya.

We stayed for another day before we decided to go back. Jasper wanted to stay longer because he's really enjoying spending time with JJ, but I knew that there were things that we needed to prioritize.

"We'll come back there if you want," I told him. I could see him stealing glances at JJ who's sleeping at the back. "If it's okay with you, do you want to come with us? I'll introduce JJ to the family..."

I waited for his answer. I didn't know if he's okay with Abuelo... I didn't tell him before... I knew that Jasper's conditioned to follow orders, but hindi ko na alam kung ano ngayon... He lost me... JJ... Evan... Maybe his perspective about following orders changed already.

"Yes, of course," he replied.

I bit my lower lip. "Okay."

He looked at me. "Why?"

"Nothing."

"What's bothering you?" he pressed on. I hated how he just knows if something's bothering me... It made it really hard for me to keep things to myself...

"Kasi... si Abuelo... I don't know if you're okay with him given the fact that he's the reason why Justin had such a hold on me..."

Kita ko kung paano humigpit ang hawak niya sa manibela. Maybe I shouldn't have brought this up yet. Kakaayos lang namin. We still had a lot of things to take care of...

"It's all in the past—"

"Yeah, but—"

"He's your family. Whatever happened before, let's leave it there. I know you love your family, and I promise to love the people you love," he said, and then looked at me briefly.

I reached for his face and caressed his cheek with my thumb. "Thank you, Jasper."

He caught my hand and kissed my knuckle. "Anything for you, Ma'am."

I wrinkled my nose. He's back at making me feel kilig again! I really feel like a teenager around Jasper! This was one of the things that didn't change!

"Where are we?" I asked when he stopped at an unfamiliar building. Hindi agad siya sumagot kasi binuhat niya si JJ na hanggang ngayon, tulog pa rin. Pinagpagan ko iyong buhok ni JJ. Kanina pa ako kung saan-saan nakakakita ng buhangin!

"My place."

I quietly followed him. It felt like he took a different elevator since isa lang iyong button. I had half a heart to ask him if he's staying in the penthouse, but my question was answered when a whole floor opened when the elevator stopped.

"After we get married, I'll sell this and we can buy a house," he said while he's still carrying JJ in his arms.

"Married?"

"That's where we're headed, right?" he asked, and when I didn't answer immediately, he looked at me, his face alarmed. "Siobhan?"

"Isn't it... fast?" I asked. We just got back together. We still had a lot of problems we needed to address...

"It's already five years too late," he said.

"Jasper—"

"Siobhan Margarette Sison Gomez de Liaño," he said, making me feel chills crawl all over my body as he said my whole name. "Please... please marry me?"

I bit my lower lip. "Nasaan iyong singsing?"

"Well, I don't have—"

"Tss. Magpo-propose ka, walang singsing?"

"I didn't even know that we're gonna get back together—"

I walked past him. "Propose when you have a ring, Jasper."

"But you're gonna say yes, right?"

"Show me the ring first."

"We already have a son!"

"So?"

"Do you want to add another child, Siobhan Margarette?" he asked, looking serious. Malaki pa naman iyong penthouse! JJ couldn't help me!

I laughed. I love seeing him frustrated. I love seeing him all riled up. I love my First Lieutenant. And maybe he's right... It's already five years too late...