---- [W -> D] ----

D: Ohh~ bars- but look-

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W: BITCH YOU BEEN KNEW.

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D: Babs was fighting some thugs and one of them says "you sure you want to do this little girl? I mean, what if we're dangerous?" and she looks him dead in the eye and says "what if I am?"

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W: We've got to clean the house now! Now people!
W: I want this place looking like Disney On Ice in one minute!

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D: I'm pretty, your pretty, what do you say we go home and stare at each other

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W: If Roy, Babs and I were drowning, and you only had time to save one p-
D: You dumbasses can't even SWIM?!!?
W: It's a hypothetical situation
W: Which would you save?
D: My time and effort

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D: You better scramble like an egg before you get folded like an omelette bro

---- [The Three Muskequeers] ----

W: Press F to pay respects
D: F
R: F

---- [W -> D] ----

D: Did they just meme together?

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W: Why are you booing me? I am right!

---- [The Three Muskequeers] ----

R: Catch me at my funeral later tonight lads
W: O? A party?
R: Your all invited to my funeral party if I die
D: Great, the only party I've been invited to and he might not even die

---- [W -> D] ----

D: Pls take ur masochistic ass out of this good christian chat

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W: Where you at
D: Sleeping on the roof

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D: u kno what nvm

---- [The Three Muskequeers] ----

W: Megan is one functioning lesbian tbh
D: Says the disaster gay
W: Fuck you functioning bi
R: Tf are you gays talking about
D: Stfu disaster bi
R: Fuck you I'm functioning
W: Are you sure about that

----

R: What r u two losers doing right now
D: Suffering
R: besides that

---- [W -> D] ----

D: What are you watching?
W: Say yes to the dress, wanna watch it with me?
W: Is
W: Is that you knocking on my door
W: How did you get here so fast
D: Open the fuck up bitch

----

W: I am fucking SPOOKED

----

D: If I could have one superpower it would be to be able to say 🅱 out loud

----

W: Question
D: Ah, yes, 3 am. The hour of Truth

----

D: 99.9999% sure I just heard Jason confess to Tim and Tim just went "bitch me too the fuck"
W: I thought they were already dating???
D: Nah, they just like- make out occasionally??

----

W: So yeah that's why I'm not allowed back in any Denny's in Ohio
D: That was a wild ride from start to finish

----

D: What's brakin bruh how u livin
W: Just livin la vida loco my dude
D: Awe swaggy fam

----

W: Oh
W: OH

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D: I come into this good household and see so much gay
D: What a time to be alive

----

W: Go back to sleep you fiend

----

D: Square up thot

----

W: Bro, my computers frozen, what do I do?
D: Ctrl + alt + despacito
W: Oh my god it worked

----

D: Wrong, bitch, take a seat

---- [The Three Muskequeers] ----

W: N o
R: What happened this time
W: We lost Tim at the mall, right?
W: And Dick just sighs
W: And goes "red robin"
W: And from a few stores over we heard Tim go "Yum"

----

R: Guy pals don't kiss each other on the lips you know
W: That's just the toxic masculinity bro

---- [W -> D] ----

D: MY LIFE IS BEING RUINED BY THE INTERNET

----

W: What's the suit for?
D: If I'm going to drop dead at any moment, I'm at least going to look fresh as fuck

----

D: Catch you later, supporting cast
W: Fuck you I am the deuteragonist of this story

----

W: Ooh, bet you don't want that hot slice of Intel re-tweeted

----

D: Hey pal, It's me, Dick, your friendly neighbourhood waste of space

----

W: It was bound to happen
D: I can still be disappointed

---- [The Three Muskequeers] ----

D: This is such a h*cking disaster
W: Why did you censor hecking
R: Because it's a fucking bad word

----

R: I cut up fruit for you fuckers like the goddamn soccer mom I am and you disrespect me like this

---- [W -> D] ----

W: Okay so James, Hartley, and I went to the convenience store and as we were walking we passed a flyer for catholic school and James went "Wally you better shape up or we're sending you to catholic school" and without looking up from his phone Hartley goes "scared straight" and James and I laughed so hard we tripped over each other and fell into a puddle

----

D: Oi, West, It's Jay cause Dickie-bird is busy being fucking obliterated by Babs so here's the story
D: So Dickie-bird gets fucking roasted by Timmy and the Babs says "haha, get rekt"
D: Then Dickie-bird pouts and is all "I want a divorce" and Babs says "fucking finally"
D: And Dickie-birds all "No, wait" and Babs is just like "can u come sign these papers?"
D: So now Dickie-bird is trailing after her around the cave like "n o w a i t"
W: Tell Babs one of my hobbies is being a legal divorce lawyer

----

W: What does the R in Richard stand for?
D: Respecting women

----

D: Is there a Denny's close to the cave
W: Its 2am
D: What's your point

----

W: R ur siblings ok?
D: Probably not why

----

D: Dude we've spent like the last three (3) months convincing Bruce to let us tell Timmy that we're superheroes or smth and he finally lets us, so we get Tim all sat in the living room and whatnot, and Jason goes "Bruce is Batman, Dickie-bird is Robin, Babs is Batgirl and I'm a fucking badass" and it's silent for a moment then Tim goes "fucking duh, yall ain't slick"
W: I fucking love Tim, he should join the squad so we hang out more often

----

W: I'm crying??? My friends are so gay????
W: James calls Hartley 'mon étoile' which means 'my star' and Hartley calls James 'mon ciel' which means 'my sky'
D: Sobbing????

----

D: Bro will you carry me bridal style?
W: I'll carry you to the kitchen to get snacks for a movie night
D: It's like you're my soulmate

---- [The Three Muskequeers] ----

W: Notice how everyone but Roy has a crush and/or is in a relationship
D: Hahaha, what a scrub
R: Haha, friendly reminder I could bench press you both :)

---- [W -> D] ----

D: I swear everyone in the Manor is dead today
D: When Tim turned on the coffee pot he whispered good morning to it
D: I ran into Babs in the hallway and all she said was "purple isn't even a real colour"
D: Jason walked down the stairs backwards holding a fishbowl full of Snickers-bars
D: I've seen Bruce walk into a wall, twice
D: And I can't find my fucking phone

----

W: We not having this conversation again
D: Wally, you can't hide from the fucking Truth. It's fucking out there
W: THERE IS NO TRUTH
D: I got into a knife fight with Mothman at 3am behind a Burger King's and you have the fucking audacity

----

D: Those are bold words for someone in stabbing range

----

W: So, how are you going to come out?
D: Over a PA system to Laura Dern

----