---- [W -> D] ----

D: This new kids' bad for my ego
D: Why don't we keep him around?

----

W: ur so pretty
D: no u
W: no u
D:

W:

D: I didn't want to have to do this but...
D:

W: I'll never forgive you

----

D: I'm 60% intelligence, 70% power, and 70% good looks
W: That's 200%
D: I'm twice the man you'll ever be
W: oh my god

----

W: You call yourself my best friend but where were you when my meme only got 4 likes
D: Making four accounts
W: Bro

----

D: Idiot

----

W: Dude you forgot to use your undercover account to @ me and I've gained like 104k followers since yesterday morning how are you so fucking famous

----

D: Make history, not a fuss
D: Do your coach, not drugs

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W: You wanna fucking die?!
D: Kinda...
W: Bro we've talked about this
W: I'll be at your place in 3 with chocolate
D: Thanks dude

----

D: I want to hold your hand and crush you in Mario Kart

----

W: There are three ways to do things:
W: The right way
W: The wrong way
W: And the Wally way
D: Isn't that just the wrong way?
W: Yeah but it's faster

----

D: AFV is just how people watched vines before Vine was a thing

----

W: This guy has been bothering me
D: Kill him.

----

D: You know, when I unfollow someone on Twitter, it makes headlines

----

W: Hold the fuck up...
D: I am the fuck up, please hold me

----

D: What do you mean your being murdered?
D: That's illegal people can't do that

----

W: I cannot believe you can't tie your own fucking shoes

----

D: I don't get it. what's the point of getting married if you're having a WINTER wedding???

----

W: What's up with your lighting? You're even more princely than usual

----

D: Beware evil ghosts, I have a pocket knife!

----

W: Ow! I didn't even say anything, you vicious bitch.

----

D: Weddings stress me out so much.
W: I don't get it, this isn't even your wedding.
D: Exactly. So since I'm an absolutely humble person, for once I need to look less glamorous than the people who're actually getting married. And it's so stressing, Wally. I can't stop being pretty.

----

W: Don't act all high and mighty just cause your rich!
D: Who's acting? I am high and mighty

----

D: Who knew poor people could be so much trouble when they band together

----

W: Oh! I know where this is going!
D: Wally has absolutely no idea where this is going. Saying he did was but a ruse to make him seem more intelligent and likable. To be fair, Wally didn't know where things were going most of the time.

----

D: Why are you so awkward and mean to me??
W: Because no one every taught me how to act around perfect
D: What?
W: What?

----

W: The risk I took was calculated
W: But man, am I bad at maths

----

D: Hey you, Amateur deluxe
W: What the hell does that mean?!
D: It means your only a light upgrade from a usual amateur

----

W: there is blood, lots of blood. about a gallon

----

D: 7 ate 9. That's cannibalism

----

W: Dude, please try not to bathe in wads of money. You'll get paper cuts.

----

D: Don't stare at the moon too long or else you'll remember that nothing in this stupid fucking world makes sense.

----

W: How are you not suspended rn
D: Well, he said, "do you understand why you're in my office right now?" And then I said, "I have more followers than Selena Gomez on Instagram, and then he said "have a nice day, Mr. Grayson, sorry to have bothered you" and here we are

----

D: You've heard of elf on the shelf, now get ready for sock on the floor!
W: That doesn't even rhyme
D: PICK UP YOUR SHIT

----

W: I think you're too famous
W: Megan is watching that new show your staring in, Artemis is wearing that cute jacket from your winter clothing line, Kaldur is reading your third book, Conner is listening to your new single, and Zantanna is reading a magazine with you on the front cover
W: Your literally fucking everywhere, the author is just being ridiculous at this point

----

D: I assume you realize this kind of idiocy will not be tolerated here.
W: Is there another type of idiocy you would be more comfortable with?

  ---- 

W: Hey dude, I got you some broses.
D: Oh man, Bro, you read my mind, I got you some daffodudes.
W: Bro

---- [The Three Muskequeers] ----

R: There is nothing worse than death.
W: I can think of a lot of things that are worse than death.
W: Losing Dick
W: Dick getting hurt
R: Wally-
W: GETTING SEPARATED FROM DICK
R: Wal-
W: Wearing crocks
R: Wals-
W: DICK DYING

---- [W -> D] ----

W: My perfect Valentine's day? I'm on the Moon, three communicators in front of me, fielding desperate calls from people who want to buy one of the fifty restaurant reservations I made over six months ago...

----

D: See, Wally sees the glass as half full, I see it as half empty
D: Its why we made such a good team
D: Roy, on the other hand, just drinks right out of the bottle
D: Tim wonders why it has to be a glass
D: And Jason usually breaks the glass by putting his feet up on the table 

----

W: Its Dick, no doubt he's going to say the most fiendish and heartless thing you've ever heard
D: What a lovely day
W: Take that back, you fiend!

----

D: Right now, I just need the one thing that makes me happy
W: I'll be right over
D: ...Oh chocolate you're always here for me
W: well fuck you to then

----

W: Do you want to hang out this weekend?
D: Generic excuse.
W: Did you just say "generic excuse"?

----

D: I learned some very valuable lessons from this whole debacle.
W: I'm assuming they're all horrible distortions of the lessons you actually should've learned.
D: Death isn't real and I'm God.

----

W: No more scams, no more cons, no more hustles, no more hoodwinks, no more gambits, no more stratagems, and no more bamboozles.
D: I notice you left out flimflams.
W: No more flimflams!
D: Damnit

----

D: I'm playing dominoes with bills, don't interrupt me

----

W: Wtf am I supposed to with myself now that I'm 18 going on 19
D: Take care of me
W: Ok

----

D: All people are at least 70% attracted to me

----

W: You exude pain, your life is a patchwork of darkness with no time for joy, how do you cope with it?
D: I have a butler

----

D: I can't believe Superbat became canon in this chapter and if it wasn't for this message, no one would have known.
W: And you just fucking drop that revel in at the end. What a power-move.

----