Tammy

The young girl, sobbing in front of them, is beautiful. Angela's eyes are bright, clear, blue, like her father's, and contrasting against the skin the color of a chocolate bar. Her satiny wavey texture hair falls around her face in long layers. The young lady is lovely.

It is heartbreaking to see tears flowing over flawless, smooth, rich skin. It breaks Tammy's heart to see Angela crying so fiercely in Mark's arms.

"He hates me," Angela speaks, looking upward to Mark. "He can't stand me. "

"No, that's not true. You know how your father can be. We all know he has a temper. It was all bad timing. " Mark tries his best to soothe Angela. He looks to Tammy for help to find the right things to say.

They'd returned, in time, to find Angela sobbing, but the two of them are crazy high and unprepared to handle things. They can't abandon the young teenager. So, here they sit, high as fuck, and trying to console Angela. Tammy grabs Mark's hand trying to offer encouragement. Tammy felt like crying herself after the night she has had.

Angela rubs her eyes. " I could tell he doesn't want me here. He sends me to that school because he doesn't want me around. "

Tammy feels Angela's pain in waves. Alexei doesn't sound as though he will be receiving father of the year anytime soon. There is no reason a young girl should be so heartbroken, early in life, by the one man who should always protect her.
Tammy feels her heart begin to race. She didn't know if it was the drugs but she feels panic as she thinks of her father. Tammy feels the need to repress whatever she is feeling at the moment.

Angela finally really looks Tammy over and stares at her in awe. Angela is no longer crying, so it is progress. "You're really pretty."

Tammy shakes her head getting on her knees, before a relieved-looking Mark. "You're the gorgeous one. "

Angela smiles softly. "You're just being nice."

Tammy smiles back. "Not at all, You popping girl. And don't get too heartbroken over your dad. Sometimes fathers don't know they aren't spending enough time with their little girls. "

"Your dad was like that?" Angela sniffles as her fingers swipe at the last tear. Angela is holding on to Tammy's every word as though it is automatically truth.

"Yeah like my dad had a lot of meetings." Saying the half-truth felt like acid in Tammy's mouth.

Tammy doesn't want to go where her mind is trying to take her. Her father had allowed a lot of things to happen to her to advance his career. Tammy was raped by his boss when she was 16. Her virginity was taken to secure her father's advancement. Smiling brightly, Tammy pushes to focus on the Present moment.

"He would be away often. When he was there, he was more focused on emails and work." Tammy keeps out how her mother, and self, began to relish those moments her father wasn't present.

Tammy hopes she is saying the right thing. She is in shock that Alexei has a daughter and a black daughter at that. Tammy can still feel Alexei's lips on her skin. She can still clearly see them in that restroom. It isn't what she wants to see. There is so much to come to terms with over that moment.

What Tammy wants the most, is that moment to leave things unchanged, but she knows that moment has changed her very fate. Once again, she's fucked up.

Angela looks at Mark. She now isn't crying at all.
"He's not easy to talk to. I don't know-how. "

Tammy doesn't know what causes her to think it, but Angela is choosing to be innocent for Mark. While an authentic display, something lets Tammy know that Angela knows a little more about some things in life than the young girl would want Mark to know.
Mark smiles and pats Angela on the head. They are still very high. So, Tammy doesn't feed into the thoughts.

She barely knows this girl, there is no way she could say if the girl was truly anything but heartbroken over her father. Yet, as Mark hugs Angela, Tammy sees a scar on Angela's wrist, peeking beneath their girl's lace trim sleeve, and Angela notices. Angela ends the hug and tugs the sleeve down and looks to hide the telling mark.

"It's alright. We'll talk to him together. You know I always have your back when it comes to him. "Mark hugs Angela fatherly and it is an interesting side to see exist in him.

Mark changes before her eyes to become a man full of strength and wisdom. The reliable energy that comes from Mark makes Tammy remember that he is intelligent and deeply empathetic.

When he glances her way, Tammy feels heat spread through her body.

Tammy doesn't know when he's ever going to look regular to her. It's always these tiny moments that remind, Mark is regular-looking but he has that extra something, star power.

Angela smiles, pulling away from the embrace and expressing fatigue. "Okay, I'm going to go to bed. I'm sorry for crying all over you both."

"It's okay Anne Anne. Get some rest and we'll talk to him in the morning." Mark grabs Tammy's hand.

The physical touch jolts are awake. Tammy is beginning to feel heavy as the adrenaline has worn off. She could sleep right where she stands.
Tammy nods as the girl shyly waves 'goodnight' leaving the seating area, within a large hallway.
Angela is very sweet, if it weren't for a very obvious resemblance, it is unbelievable that Angela is the spawn of Alexei.

The girl doesn't have a mother figure. For some reason, Tammy sees herself in Angela.

"I'm going to shower." She tells Mark gathering some random comfortable clothes.

Tammy is falling asleep as she walks but she won't lay in bed with Alexei's kisses on her skin. Her body is still sore from the way Alexei handled her and she needs to wash the moment away. Tammy needs to wrap her mind around what happened. She doesn't remember all the pieces.

"Lemme come." Mark frowns at Tammy's hand on his chest.

"No, we aren't showering together Mark. I need that space. " and she needs to not find out if he recognizes this brand.

Tammy is too tired, to keep in mind, hiding it.

"Fine, you're right. Do you mind if I sleep in here?" Mark stares right into her eyes and it makes her nervous.

Tammy bit her lip, knowing that they should talk about what happened tonight. "Do you mind if it's tomorrow?"

Mark smiles as he comes near. "Not at all, see, you keep me focused."

"Get out Mark." Tammy almost moans feeling weary and unable to keep up the farce that she is fine.

She's not fine.

Mark looks down into her eyes with intensity. His hand levels with the side of her face. Lifting her chin, Mark peers into her eyes. He takes his time scanning over her features. Tammy still doesn't know what he won't confront her. Why is he letting this go?

"You know something, I'll never judge you for anything."Mark's thumb traces the cleft of her chin, his thumbnail softly scraping.
"I want you to know that Tammy. I only want to be the person you come to for help. I want to be the one you need. I want to help you, however, I can. We don't have to talk until it's the right time. "

Tammy fights the urge to cry and nods that she understands. "Tonight has been terrible and I just could use a little alone time. "

Mark looks at her lips. "I understand. "

When Mark kisses her, Tammy feels herself sleeping again. The room melts away and the thoughts of Alexei are far. There is just calm.
Tammy fights to awake, knowing that she needs to be alone. Summoning great control, Tammy broke the tender kiss and looks back into Mark's dark eyes.

"Goodnight Tammy." Mark traces her bottom lip with his thumb. There was so much longing in his eyes.

"Goodnight Mark. " She somehow says and regrets watching him walk out of the door. Tammy wants him to distract her from everything she's avoiding.

********************************

Stepping into the shower feels amazing, the steam and hot jets of water make her body relax. Tonight she allows the water to run through her hair. She's too tired to wash it properly.

It stings when she applies the washcloth to her private. Tammy avoids looking in the mirror.

Her mind went back to the bathroom.

The fuck is wrong with her? Tammy hadn't been so out of control since college. Why would she do that with Alexei?

She has Mark and she didn't even know Alexei. She didn't even like him.

Yet, what happened couldn't be undone. Tammy has two, too many, secrets to keep from Mark.

Tammy wants to just tell Mark everything, but they weren't in a relationship. There was no guarantee he would be there for her.

If anything, she could upset Mark. He made it clear he has a plan, where she is concerned. His elevation and respect matter to him, and she witnessed enough to know, Mark has hair-thin anger. . .

She has to wait until things are stable for her.

Upon leaving the bathroom, Tammy jumps to find, Alexei, standing against the wall. He is holding out a robe which she greedily wraps in before moving away.

Things are still, too raw, as she has to see him. Tammy is ashamed.

Alexei grips her wrist hard when she reaches for the clothes. " I gave you the robe so I wouldn't see you unclothed."

Tammy's hands shook. She felt tears well up. She didn't know what was wrong with her. That's why she needed more time with Alexei distant. She can't make anything make sense.

"Does my modesty even matter anymore, after what happened? " The question is genuine.

Tammy asks about everything. After the branding and after the bathroom, does she have modesty? It appears, not, but she isn't, yet, without shame.

"I know it hurts. "Alexei says in a silky whisper, almost to where Tammy couldn't hear. "I'm sorry. "

"Why'd you do it?" Tammy spoke softly, her voice matching his somber and contrite. "I'm not blaming you, I know I could have screamed and I could have fought... "

For a moment they stare, examining one another. He is so huge. His expression is unreadable. "You're mine, I can feel it with everything within me."

"Why?" Tammy asks again.

That's all he's been saying since he broke into Mark's apartment and branded her. Why is she so special?

Alexei stands using his height to intimidate her. He yanks her hair back, with perfect control, and searches her eyes, a while, after scanning her face. "Who knows why fucked up shit happens. "

A tear slid from her eye. "You're hurting me."

"Good." He lets her hair go. Before moving to the door. He opens it and closed it before looking back and said. "I don't care if you hate me. I'm going to make sure you can't ignore this. "

"Yes, you do. " Tammy chokes out. "I don't know what your problem is, but I know you pretend to be something you're not. If you didn't care what I feel, why are you here? "

Alexei wears a conflicted look and he stares pointedly, down, at the floor, before back at Tammy's face. The silence speaks volumes. The way overly hot emotions tend to do, get to a place where you are more feelings than if things add up.

Tammy is the first to look away, with clenching of her jaw and a deep breath. Alexei isn't Mark, she doesn't have to have such an emotional response to him, she doesn't want to.

"We seem to have done a lot of things, we didn't think through. I'm sorry that, I did, what I did.

I'm sorry that you liked it. Im sorry, Mark brought you into all of this." Alexei clears his throat and gives her a look of sincerity.

He leaves and Tammy angrily shuts the door behind him. Then, falling to her knees, in front of it, angry, and fearful, tears are falling from her face.

A hand covers her mouth so she doesn't make noise. In an overwhelming wave, she misses her family. She misses her job. She misses life before getting involved in all of this.

For the first day, she feels like a prisoner. She feels punished.