Amanda and Niall sat in silence for a long time. Niall had texted Harry and told him he wouldn't be back to the writing session and then just sat there. Neither knew what to say. Neither knew how to start. It was never a discussion they had thought they'd have to have. They'd never discussed having children, or when they would like them in life. To Niall, it seemed like if it happened, then it did. There was no choice. He would accept it, and if she was pregnant now, they would deal with it, together. He was caught off guard when she mentioned options. No matter how shocked he was, that thought had never come to his mind. He'd never felt so far apart from her before.

Amanda looked at Niall a couple times, but she wasn't sure what to say or do. She wasn't ready for a baby. At all. She didn't know what she would have done. If she had been pregnant, she didn't know if she could have handled it. She was shocked at Niall's acceptance of it. She wasn't ready. And he was ready to jump right in. It scared the hell out of her to think about becoming a mother. Especially now. Especially when Niall was touring around the world. All the time. Always somewhere or another. She couldn't see herself raising a baby right now, and then pretty much alone. She knew they would be financially stable, but that wasn't it. It was everything else. She knew she would have JJ, but that would have been a lot to ask of JJ. To help her raise a baby while her boyfriend was touring.

Niall got up and went to the kitchen for a bottle of water. He brought one back to Amanda and handed it to her. He sat back down; and after a few more minutes, he looked at her. "Guess we need to talk."

"Yeah." Amanda said. She didn't look up. She was still shocked at all of this.

"Amanda." Niall sighed. This was going to be harder than he thought. He couldn't help but think about her not wanting to keep a baby they'd made together.

"I don't know what to say to you, Niall. I'm sorry. Really, I am. But I'm relieved. I'm relieved I'm not pregnant. I don't want to have a baby right now. I'm not ready. I'm sorry I messed up and that I didn't remember to start taking the birth control. I was just, I don't know." She said looking at her hands.

"It's not that. Ok, well at first, I was shocked you didn't take it. But it happens. What hurts me is that you would think of anything other than having a baby if it did happen. That you would think there are any other options at this point. I get it's not a great time. I wouldn't have planned it either. But I love you. And if a baby came from our love, then I would accept it as a part of you and me." He said to her.

"Well, I'm glad you're so noble, Niall. I'm glad that you will be a knight in shining armor all the time and accept whatever happens. I'm sorry that I'm too selfish to just jump right there. I'm 22. I'm not ready to have a baby. Especially when you're going to be nowhere to be found for months at a time. That's no way to raise a baby, especially when I'm not ready." Amanda said.

"I get that." Niall said.

"I don't think you do." She stood up. "You wouldn't have to be pregnant for nine months and not have me here with you through most of it. You wouldn't have to give birth and keep a baby while I was off touring the world. You wouldn't have your whole life changed as soon as that line on that test came up."

"You're right. Sort of. My life would change a lot, Amanda. I wouldn't ever leave you without help. I would never leave you to struggle. I can't believe you would think that." Niall said sitting back on the couch.

"That's not what I said. I know I would have everything financially I needed. I know we would never want for anything. Anything but you there with us." Amanda said crossing her arms. "Don't you see that?"

"Yes, ok, I get that. It wouldn't be great. It wouldn't be awesome. It wouldn't be the way we would want it. But for you to think about anything other than having the baby." Niall said. He couldn't get over that.

"I never made ANY decision. I was scared. I was overwhelmed. I know I'm not ready! It's totally unfair of you to even say anything like that. Like I wouldn't sit here and think about it constantly. Like I wouldn't weigh every option. I'm SORRY that I can't just grasp it and hold onto it. I am NOT ready." Amanda said angrily. "And I KNOW I'm not ready!"

"Well, I'm not ready either!" Niall said standing up and walking around the couch. "I'm not ready. I wouldn't have planned it. But I guess we always knew it could happen. Can't guarantee it wouldn't. So, what? Now we just don't have sex for the rest of our relationship until you're ready?" He asked. Emotions were running high. He knew that he probably wasn't being reasonable. But this had hit him hard. He never would have guessed they would have disagreed on this.

"That's ridiculous! Seriously, right now? Come on. Yes, it's a scare. Yes, I was freaked out. No, I didn't know what to do. But aren't you being just a bit ridiculous now?!" She asked him.

"Ridiculous?!" He raised his eyebrows. "Ridiculous to wonder why the girl I love would choose anything other than having my baby."

"Ridiculous to think that it's just that fucking simple!" Amanda said starting to cry. She took a step back when Niall took a step towards her. "Don't! Not right now. I know I would have help. I know that. And I know JJ would be here for me whenever you wouldn't. But how fair would that be to her?!? To put that on her when you wouldn't be here! Because I'm not stupid enough to think I'm able to do this on my own. Not now! I wish you would think about THAT instead of focusing on something I never even decided. It's not fair to change everyone else's life because of a mistake I made! Don't you see that? Jesus Christ, Niall!"

Niall stopped when she stepped back from him. "Wow. How can you not see my point? You love me, you say you love me, you say you love me for who I am but yet now, it's a huge deal."

"Of course, it is!!!!! I can take care of myself. But to bring a baby into a world when I'm not ready and you're not around!? That's SELFISH! Our baby would deserve the world. And all the love and all the support. When we're READY!" Amanda said crying harder. "I can't take this!"

"Well, life isn't perfect and doesn't go as planned all the time!! I can promise you that I would have NEVER asked you to give up OUR baby or other "options" as you say! I would have done EVERYTHING I could have to make it right!" Niall said.

"Well making it right isn't always as easy as it seems!" Amanda said. "But why do we need to do this anyway?! The test was negative!"

"Because it's the THOUGHT. The thought that if it should happen, you would be willing to disregard it as a mistake!" Niall said holding back the emotion in his voice.

"That's NOT HOW IT IS!" Amanda said. "I can't believe you're so focused on something I wanted to think about or discuss!"

"Yeah, well, I guess we're just not going to agree on this." Niall said. "So, what do we do?"

"I don't know. But I think I need to go home right now." Amanda said wiping her eyes.

"Really?" Niall asked a bit caught off guard.

"Yeah, I need some time." She said going to his room. Time. And she needed JJ. She needed to talk to JJ. This was just too much. She'd never expected this. She didn't want this. And she didn't expect Niall to react like he had. She expected conflict, but she'd never expected not to be able to talk through it with him. She couldn't deal with it right now. She couldn't deal with him right now. They couldn't come to an agreement. She could go home. They needed to think about this. Not just scream the same things at each other all night. She picked up her phone and texted JJ that she was coming home. God, she'd never felt she needed her friend more than she did now.

Niall watched Amanda walk out of the bedroom with her bag. "You're really going to go?" He asked her with tears in his eyes.

"Yes. I'm sorry. I hate this. I don't want to fight with you, and I hate seeing you upset, but we just can't come to an agreement right now. And I just need some time." She said. It was breaking her heart to see him like that. She never wanted to hurt him. Ever. He was such a great man. He was brilliant and the guy she thought was perfect for her. But right now, she couldn't get past this. He couldn't even understand how hard this was for her. She needed that understanding right now. Maybe after some time to think about it, they could come to an agreement. But right now, it just wasn't working. She didn't see his point, and he didn't see hers.

"I don't want to fight with you either. I don't want to see you cry. I don't want to see you upset. I do get how hard this is for you." He sighed. "But if you feel you need to go, then who am I to stop you." He walked toward the bedroom. He was hurt, and sad, and upset. But he wouldn't beg her to stay. Not if she didn't want to. Guess they could take some time. He was hurt more than he thought. He was sort of surprised by his own reaction. But he knew. He would raise that baby and be proud of that baby. It would be his. And hers. And that's all that would have mattered.

Amanda sighed and walked out the door. It was negative. All this over something that wasn't even something to begin with. Realizing they didn't think anywhere near the same on this was hard. Really hard. She waited for the cab to come and take her home. This would be the first time they would be in the same city and wouldn't be together by choice. She cried the whole way home when she got in the cab.

Julie walked into her apartment and threw the keys on the table. What a disaster. She was now more exhausted than ever, but she couldn't think of anything other than Panda. God, she couldn't even imagine what she was going through. She hoped she and Niall were able to work things out. She stepped into the front room never even looking up.

"Hey." Harry said standing up from the couch. "Where were you?"

"Oh. Hey. I didn't expect you to be back yet." She forced a smile at him. "I was with Amanda."

"Oh. I was supposed to write with Niall tonight. But he left something at home and then texted and said he wouldn't be back. So, I just came home." He looked at her face. "Well that's the fakest smile I've seen in a while. What's going on?"

"Amanda had an issue. She called. I went." Julie said sitting down on the couch and rubbing her face.

"That's all I get? Obviously, it was a bit more than that." Harry said sitting next to her.

Julie didn't think it was her place to tell him. But she figured he would find out anyway. And she did feel she needed someone to talk to about it. "She, ugh, I probably shouldn't tell you. She thought she might be pregnant. She was late."

"Whoa." Harry said, eyes widening at what he was just told. "Really?"

"Yes, and Niall came home while I was out getting tests for her. I wanted to have her take it before he got back." She said pulling her legs up under her.

"Why? Why would she need to take it before he got home?" Harry asked. Seemed odd to him.

"She was scared. She was freaked out. She realized she'd made a mistake by not being on birth control when we went to Indonesia. She didn't know what to do. I figured instead of worrying about telling him, she should find out if it was true first." Julie said pulling a pillow onto her lap and playing with the fringe.

"Really? Don't you think he should've been the first person she told?" Harry asked.

"Not my place to decide. She didn't. She came to me, and I was going to help her." Julie said. "So, I got the tests; but when I got back, Niall was already there, and she had told him. They weren't agreeing on things, so I just had her take the test. It was negative. But they had a disagreement, and neither seemed to understand each other. So I told them to talk it out, and Niall needed to stay and others would just have to understand."

"What were they disagreeing on?" He asked.

"She wanted to have options. He didn't think she should." Julie said.

"Options? What options?" Harry asked.

"About having the baby." Julie said looking at him. What did he mean what options?

"There shouldn't have been a discussion. If she was pregnant, what options would she need?" Harry asked. Really? Why would there need to be a discussion about options? What they would do to make it work, yes, but options?

"What? Are you kidding? She's not ready for a baby. She should be able to think about it and discuss her options." Julie said.

"So, you're telling me that if this happened to us, that you would think about options?" Harry looked at her. "Really? Cuz I think it's pretty obvious what the only option would be."

"She's not me. And I think that's extremely unfair." Julie said. "That's a huge responsibility. Especially since you would be gone through most of it. Just like Niall would be."

"Of course, timing would suck. But there is no question in my mind that I would love anything created by us." Harry said.

"That's not fair either Harry, because that's not how it is. Could you imagine it? Having a baby now? While you're out on tour and I'm sitting here working in the ER by myself? Because I think that would be a lot to expect." She said putting the pillow down.

Harry played with the rings on his fingers. "Well, if you were having my baby, I think that you wouldn't have to worry about working. I think I could manage taking care of you and the baby."

"That's ridiculous. So, I should just give up my life to carry and have your baby when we weren't ready for it? Because we made a mistake?" She sat up and put her feet on the floor.

"A mistake? I don't think I would ever look at it as a mistake. How could that be a mistake?" He stood up and started pacing the room.

"Oh, this is a ridiculous conversation. Why are we even having it?" Julie said leaning back against the back of the couch.

"Why? Because I can't believe you would think like that. We would make beautiful children. You would make a great mom, and I think I would be ok at being a dad." Harry said to her.

"Wow. I can barely take care of myself right now. I can barely get through the day on my own, and you think I would be able to raise a child. On my own. While you were out roaming the world." She said.

"That's not true. You take care of yourself just fine. And I still think you would make a great mother." He had thought that when he walked in on her in South Africa. He couldn't believe she would think of options. He was with Niall on this one.

"Oh, this is just ridiculous. Seriously. I'm on birth control. I didn't miss any. I'm not pregnant, and I don't plan on becoming pregnant anytime soon. I'm not ready. I know that. I need to get me straight before I would even consider having children." Julie said standing up herself. "This isn't even a conversation we need to be having right now."

"Why not? If we disagree on it, don't you think we should talk it out beforehand?" Harry asked.

"No. I think this is a conversation we can have when we're ready to discuss it." She said walking towards the kitchen.

"Well, I'm ready now. I think we need to discuss what would happen if something like that should happen to us. It's always possible." He said.

"No, it's not, Harry. Not likely at all. But, right now, we're not talking about us. It's about them. It was something she was scared over, and I get that." She said grabbing her phone from the counter. "Why are we fighting over it?"

"Because I can't believe it's even a question in your mind. I can't believe you would think she's right to think about other options. You should be on Niall's side on this one." Harry said. He regretted it immediately when she looked up into his eyes. Yep. He was in trouble.

"I should be on Niall's side? Are you serious, right now? So, because you're on Niall's side, I just should be? Yeah, I don't think so. I get Amanda. I get where she's coming from. I get her fear, and I think she should be able to discuss any options she wants. I think your assuming you know how it feels is egotistical and big-headed of you. I also think that your putting us in a situation that neither of us would have any clue how it feels is completely unfair." Julie said. She looked down at her phone when her text message went off. "Panda's coming home. I think you should go."

"You think I should go? Are you fucking kidding me, right now?" He said walking towards her.

"Not in the least. Panda needs me. And I will be there for her through whatever she needs. She's coming home. To her home and she doesn't need to see this." She said putting her phone on the table. "So, you should go."

"Fuck that. We're having a disagreement that doesn't mean I need to go." Harry said.

"No, it doesn't." She said. "But I won't have you here when you're questioning her intentions and her thoughts and what she's feeling."

"Come on." He said. "I think you're being ridiculous now."

"Of course, I am, because I don't agree with you, so now I'm ridiculous." She said.

"Fine, I'll go. So, because they're fighting we have to, also?" He asked.

"No, we're fighting because you refuse to accept that we don't all have to feel the same and that doesn't make us wrong." She said.

"Yeah, same." He said as he went and grabbed his bag. He hadn't even opened his LA home yet. So, he would have to go to a hotel. Or to Niall's. Yeah, he would just go to Niall's. She was being ridiculous. But he wanted to stay and work it out. When he turned to watch her though, she had closed right up. He could see it in her body language. They wouldn't work anything out tonight, so he might as well just go and hope they could work it out tomorrow. Damn it. It wasn't even their issue. She was right about that. Yet here they were, spending the night apart anyway. He shook his head and left. Fuck this.

Julie waited for Amanda to get home. She had everything set up on the coffee table in front of the couch. Tissues, movies, ice cream, and chocolate syrup. Anything that she believed would make Amanda feel better. When Amanda came in, she immediately went up and hugged her. She didn't even say anything. She took her to the couch and sat down with her. She held her tightly and let her cry. Julie knew she needed it. "I love you Panda. I will be here with you. Always. Things will be ok." She couldn't worry about her and Harry right now. She couldn't. Amanda was all she could concentrate on. She kissed her head and sat there with her. A movie on in the background and held her for hours. Until Amanda fell asleep. She wasn't going to move. She fell asleep out of pure exhaustion after a while. Why did life have to be so complicated? One step forward and two steps back. Every time.

Uh oh!?! Does this spell disaster for one or both of our couples??!?  What do you think?

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